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FAMILY TIES
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Season 7, Episode 15
"'Til Her Daddy Takes the T-Bird Away"
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<i>? I bet we've been together
for a million years ?</i>
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<i>? And I'll bet we'll be together
for a million more ?</i>
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<i>? Oh, it's like
I started breathing ?</i>
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<i>? On the night we kissed ?</i>
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<i>? And I can't remember
what I ever did before ?</i>
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<i>? What would we do, baby ?</i>
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<i>? Without us? ?</i>
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<i>? What would we do, baby ?</i>
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<i>? Without us? ?</i>
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<i>? And there ain't no nothin' ?</i>
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<i>? We can't love
each other through ?</i>
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<i>? Ooh-hoo ?</i>
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<i>? What would we do, baby ?</i>
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<i>? Without us? ?</i>
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<i>? Sha-la-la-la. ?</i>
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Oh, what are you working on?
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Oh, I'm writing a play
for my history class.
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It's about the final days
of Richard Nixon's presidency.
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Oh, a comedy.
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Well, it's got a little bit
of everything, Mom.
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You'll laugh, you'll cry.
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I call it "Ain't Misbehavin'...
All Right, Maybe I Am."
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- Oh.
- Wait, listen to this.
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From the discussions I have had
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with congressional
and other leaders,
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I have concluded that because
of the Watergate matter...
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Dick!
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Dick, you've finally
come for me!
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Dick?
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Alex, pull yourself together.
It's just a tape.
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I'm writing a play of...
of the day Nixon resigned.
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Hey, Jen, that is great.
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That is great.
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Do you realize
that you are writing a play
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about the greatest president
this country has ever known?
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Wait a minute, Alex.
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You've always said
that Ronald Reagan
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was the greatest president.
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I heard you say that, too, Alex.
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Which is it, Nixon or Reagan?
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Ooh, boy. Whew.
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Well, Nixon...
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has a better body.
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Why isn't Mallory home yet?
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Ah, who cares?
More oxygen for us.
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I don't know. She's probably
still out with Nick.
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She knows I need
the car by 4:00.
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You'd think between the two
of them, they could tell time.
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Yeah, well, maybe if Nick
takes the big hand
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and Mallory takes
the little hand...
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Nah.
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- Hi.
- Hey...
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Hey.
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Young lady, do you have
any idea what time it is?
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Well, no. Nick, do you?
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Um...
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Just glad Darwin
isn't alive to see this.
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Didn't I tell you
to get the car back by 4:00?
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I've got something
very important to do today.
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Oh, sorry, Dad. We tried,
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but the Artists' Alliance
for Peace meeting
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ran a little late.
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Hey, I want peace
as much as the next guy,
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but I've got to get
a new pair of galoshes.
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Dad, this is ridiculous.
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There are too many drivers in
the house and not enough cars.
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It's true, Dad. In a few months,
I'm going to be driving,
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and I'm going to need
a car, too.
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Yeah, and on Wednesday,
August 11, 2003,
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I'm gonna need the car to take
Marion Davis to the movies.
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She said she'd consider
going outwith me
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sometime next century.
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Dad, you know,
I've been saving up,
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and I think I have enough
for a really fun car.
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Oh, oh, and you may remember
my dad runs the biggest
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and most often sued used car lot
in the Midwest.
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Well, I think it's a good idea.
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- We could definitely use
another car. - Definitely.
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Great. Then Nick and I
will go down to the showroom
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- and pick something out.
- Now, wait.
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Wait a minute, wait a minute.
I better go with you.
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It's very easy to get swindled
in one of those places.
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Dad, it's Nick's dad.
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Oh, hey, hey, hey.
All the more reason.
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Uh, Bill will take care of you.
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Congratulations on your vehicle.
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Hey...
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Hey!
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- Hey.
- Hi.
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Ho.
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Um, Joe, do you remember my dad,
Steven Keaton?
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Oh, yes, yes.
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Very nice to resume
our relationship.
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Always a pleasure.
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Hey, um, Dad,
Mal's here to buy a car.
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Ooh, la la.
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Well, you came
to the right place.
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Ooh, I like that one.
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No, no, honey.
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The only thing
that works in that
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is the glove compartment.
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Well, uh, hey, we don't want
to waste your time too much.
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We'll, uh, get down to business.
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Well, well, well, well,
what business?
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Whoa, whoa, take it easy.
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Come on, let's schmooze
a little bit.
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You're family.
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Well, inasmuch as we're both
in the family of man.
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Steven, what I am
trying to tell you
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is that you can never
waste my time.
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Now, come on, sit down.
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What's been going on
in your life?
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- Well, uh, I'm still...
- I got just the car for you.
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Oh, this is, uh...
yeah, I like this.
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This looks like
a very sturdy vehicle.
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Dad, it looks like something
that broke off a glacier.
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Honey, I think this looks nice.
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Oh, I like that one.
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That cute little Karmann Ghia.
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Oh, Mal, Mal, come on,
I don't know about that.
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Are you sure this care is safe?
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Safe?
I can assure you that it's safe.
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I personally use it
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to drive back and forth
to the small claims court.
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Which is a lot of round trips.
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Oh, I'm crazy about it.
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How much is it?
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Mal, Mal, God...
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You got to play
these things cool.
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She's crazy about it.
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How much is it?
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For you?
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$3,500.
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Isn't that a little high?
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Okay, all right.
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Tell you what I'm going to do.
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I'm going to give you
this beauty
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for $3,000 even.
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I've never done this before.
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I'm doing this
only because I love you.
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I love you, too.
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$2,500.
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I love you slightly less.
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A deal.
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Oh, honey,
it's yours for $2,500.
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Dad, that's way out of my range.
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No problem, Mallory.
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Go to a bank
and partake of a loan.
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No, I would never qualify.
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No, we just better look
for something else.
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Well, how it would make you feel
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if I were to cosign
for the loan?
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Really?
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You are the best daddy
in the whole wide world.
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Oh, great!
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You are the best daddy
in the whole wide world.
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I'm not cosigning
nothing for you.
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Boo.
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Alex, I don't want your help.
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Come on.
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Jen, I just...
I just came by to see
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if you needed any more
source material.
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No, thank you, Alex.
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I have <i>The Final Days</i>
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by Woodward and Bernstein,
I have manuscripts
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of the Watergate hearings,
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and I have several back copies
of the <i>Washington Post</i>.
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Well, that's, uh...
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that's great, Jen.
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But I have a much more
reliable publication.
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<i>Nixie.</i>
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The official magazine
of the Richard Nixon Fan Club,
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of which I have been
a charter member since 1967.
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You've been the only member
since 1967.
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Oh, God, who would want
to see him in a swimsuit?
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With the nose clips.
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Hey. Jen?
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Turn the page.
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Come on, he looks great
on the bearskin rug.
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Hey, hey.
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00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:11,410
- Hey. Hey. Where have
you guys been? - Hi.
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At the mall.
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Yeah, went to the auto
accessories store.
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You should see all
the great stuff I got.
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Look. "Shopaholic on board."
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And...
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for our driving comfort,
sheepskin seat covers.
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And matching pants.
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And, for complete cosmetic care
on the road,
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a visor mirror
that just happens to be...
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full length.
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That's great, Mal.
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You look in that
while you're driving,
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you'll be the prettiest girl
at the three-car pile-up.
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Dad, I so appreciate you
doing this for me.
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00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:54,120
- I love you.
- Aw...
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00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:57,376
Mal, these are the kinds
of moments a father lives for.
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00:08:58,571 --> 00:09:00,730
Dad, I love you, too.
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00:09:00,770 --> 00:09:02,879
The moment is over, Nick.
202
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Hey.
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00:09:07,070 --> 00:09:08,670
- Hey.
- Hi.
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00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:11,640
- Ho.
- Huh?
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00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:12,970
Good news, everybody.
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00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:14,640
Everything has been approved
for your car loan.
207
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,540
- Here are the pertinent
documents. - Oh, great.
208
00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:18,180
Oh, perhaps we should
look these over, honey?
209
00:09:18,220 --> 00:09:19,211
Yeah, you're right.
210
00:09:19,251 --> 00:09:20,850
You better look them over.
211
00:09:20,890 --> 00:09:24,620
As a matter of fact,
I better look them over here.
212
00:09:24,660 --> 00:09:28,190
Oh, no, what was I
thinking here?
213
00:09:28,230 --> 00:09:31,260
I can't do this
to somebody I know.
214
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:34,630
I can't do this to somebody
I don't know.
215
00:09:34,670 --> 00:09:35,960
See this?
216
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,961
- I can go to jail for this.
- Oh.
217
00:09:38,001 --> 00:09:40,130
I know.
I've gone to jail for this.
218
00:09:40,170 --> 00:09:42,270
This is a travesty.
219
00:09:42,310 --> 00:09:45,140
Ethics: very difficult.
220
00:09:45,180 --> 00:09:46,300
Here we go.
221
00:09:46,340 --> 00:09:47,810
A pure document.
222
00:09:47,850 --> 00:09:50,110
All that is required
is your signatures,
223
00:09:50,150 --> 00:09:52,041
and the vehicle will be yours.
224
00:09:52,081 --> 00:09:53,196
Mallory?
225
00:10:01,033 --> 00:10:02,590
Steven, your plume.
226
00:10:02,630 --> 00:10:04,460
Thank you.
227
00:10:04,500 --> 00:10:06,060
Nick, this is so exciting.
228
00:10:06,100 --> 00:10:07,530
We'll finally
get to take that trip
229
00:10:07,570 --> 00:10:09,030
we've been dreaming about.
230
00:10:09,070 --> 00:10:11,061
That's right. Enjoy yourselves.
231
00:10:11,101 --> 00:10:13,461
What-what trip?
232
00:10:13,501 --> 00:10:15,100
Oh, Dad, I've got this
all planned out.
233
00:10:15,140 --> 00:10:16,730
This spring break, Nick and I
234
00:10:16,770 --> 00:10:18,240
are going to drive
around the country.
235
00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:20,341
We are going to see
the U.S. of A.
236
00:10:20,381 --> 00:10:21,841
And after that,
we're going to head
237
00:10:21,881 --> 00:10:24,300
south of the border,
straight into Rhode Island.
238
00:10:26,526 --> 00:10:28,981
Well, I'm not so sure
I'm happy with this idea.
239
00:10:29,021 --> 00:10:31,120
Eh, why don't we just
sign the papers,
240
00:10:31,160 --> 00:10:32,920
and we'll chat
about travel plans later?
241
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,451
Mal... Mallory, I don't want you
242
00:10:35,491 --> 00:10:37,620
gallivanting
all over the country.
243
00:10:37,660 --> 00:10:38,990
Oh. Hey. Hey. Hey.
244
00:10:39,030 --> 00:10:40,561
We are not gonna gallivant.
245
00:10:40,601 --> 00:10:43,091
- We're gonna drive.
- Yeah.
246
00:10:43,131 --> 00:10:45,030
Hey, Stevie boy,
I hear you've got
247
00:10:45,070 --> 00:10:48,200
one humdinger of a signature.
248
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,430
How about
a demonstration of same?
249
00:10:50,470 --> 00:10:51,600
No.
250
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:52,870
Dad, what's the problem?
251
00:10:52,910 --> 00:10:54,270
Sign the paper.
252
00:10:54,310 --> 00:10:56,140
- I don't want to.
- Why not?
253
00:10:56,180 --> 00:10:57,641
I don't want you
to go on this trip.
254
00:10:57,681 --> 00:11:00,010
What are you talking about?
255
00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:02,632
I can do whatever I want.
I'm 20 years old!
256
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,120
Oh, yeah?
257
00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:08,750
Well, I'm 40 years old!
258
00:11:08,790 --> 00:11:10,920
Mrs. Keaton,
you must be familiar
259
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,213
with your husband's signature.
260
00:11:15,041 --> 00:11:16,591
"And so, on his last day
in office,
261
00:11:16,631 --> 00:11:18,161
"Nixon stood and addressed
the White House staff.
262
00:11:18,201 --> 00:11:19,360
"Nixon:
263
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:22,070
"And so, friends,
we leave with high hopes,
264
00:11:22,110 --> 00:11:24,300
"with deep humility
and eight settings
265
00:11:24,340 --> 00:11:26,627
of the good White House china."
266
00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:32,610
"Nixon turns to the helicopter,
bumps into Gerald Ford
267
00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:35,868
and says, 'Pardon me,
if you know what I mean.'"
268
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:39,920
Jennifer, how could you?
269
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:43,790
And with him
sitting here the whole time.
270
00:11:43,830 --> 00:11:45,690
Come on, Mr. President.
271
00:11:45,730 --> 00:11:47,830
Go upstairs, and I'll tell you
272
00:11:47,870 --> 00:11:50,931
all the bad things
that Jennifer's been accused of.
273
00:11:50,971 --> 00:11:53,355
And we won't pardon her.
274
00:11:57,717 --> 00:12:00,240
So, uh...
275
00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,710
Have you seen Mallory
around recently?
276
00:12:02,750 --> 00:12:04,980
Well, she still lives here.
277
00:12:05,020 --> 00:12:07,581
I wouldn't know.
She's not talking to me anymore.
278
00:12:07,621 --> 00:12:09,750
Well, Steven,
you disappointed her.
279
00:12:09,790 --> 00:12:11,320
You said you'd cosign
for the loan,
280
00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:12,750
and then you changed your mind.
281
00:12:12,790 --> 00:12:14,920
Oh, sure, make me the heavy.
282
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:16,421
Okay.
283
00:12:16,461 --> 00:12:19,860
When we were 19, didn't we drive
from Berkeley to Washington, DC
284
00:12:19,900 --> 00:12:21,860
- over Christmas vacation?
- That's right. We did.
285
00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:24,300
And it practically
drove your father insane.
286
00:12:24,340 --> 00:12:27,700
I know, but wasn't it worth it?
287
00:12:27,740 --> 00:12:30,717
Don't you remember what it
was like out under the stars?
288
00:12:33,019 --> 00:12:36,210
The two of us in that, uh...
289
00:12:36,250 --> 00:12:38,241
tattered old sleeping bag.
290
00:12:38,281 --> 00:12:40,750
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
291
00:12:40,790 --> 00:12:43,511
Oh, my God, Elyse.
Your father was right.
292
00:12:43,551 --> 00:12:46,520
I take it back.
I take it all back.
293
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:49,390
We were bad, bad kids.
294
00:12:49,430 --> 00:12:51,313
Oh, Steven.
295
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:53,990
- Hi, Mom.
- Hi.
296
00:12:54,030 --> 00:12:55,883
Hey, Mrs. Keaton.
Hey, Mr. Keaton.
297
00:12:57,610 --> 00:13:00,131
Oh, oh, I-I forgot. Um...
298
00:13:00,171 --> 00:13:04,800
Uh, Mr. Keaton, we are giving
you the silent treatment.
299
00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:07,841
Which means I am not at liberty
to talk with you at the moment,
300
00:13:07,881 --> 00:13:09,271
though, in the very near future,
301
00:13:09,311 --> 00:13:11,380
I'm sure we can chat
like we used to.
302
00:13:11,420 --> 00:13:12,841
Uh, maybe we could discuss...
303
00:13:12,881 --> 00:13:15,550
When does your silent treatment
begin, Nick?
304
00:13:15,590 --> 00:13:18,581
Because I'm really
looking forward to it.
305
00:13:18,621 --> 00:13:20,790
Oh... no, no, no.
It's on right now.
306
00:13:20,830 --> 00:13:22,151
Perhaps you didn't follow me.
307
00:13:22,191 --> 00:13:23,251
Hush.
308
00:13:23,291 --> 00:13:24,821
You're not supposed to talk.
309
00:13:24,861 --> 00:13:26,391
No, no.
310
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:29,830
No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
311
00:13:29,870 --> 00:13:32,831
You see, I can talk
with you, Mrs. Keaton.
312
00:13:32,871 --> 00:13:35,451
The point is, if I was
to talk with Mr. Keaton...
313
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:42,341
...there would be no point.
314
00:13:42,381 --> 00:13:44,680
Nick, honey, let's go upstairs.
315
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,410
We still have
to plan our vacation.
316
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:48,110
Oh, hey, hey.
We don't have to plan.
317
00:13:48,150 --> 00:13:49,880
It's just gonna be you and me
318
00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,850
sleeping in our bags
under the stars.
319
00:13:51,890 --> 00:13:54,868
You are bad, bad kids.
320
00:13:57,636 --> 00:13:59,691
Mallory, you don't know
what you're getting into
321
00:13:59,731 --> 00:14:00,791
with this trip.
322
00:14:00,831 --> 00:14:02,590
You don't know
anything about cars.
323
00:14:02,630 --> 00:14:04,700
It can be
very dangerous, you know.
324
00:14:04,740 --> 00:14:07,700
You know, if you recharge
the battery the wrong way,
325
00:14:07,740 --> 00:14:09,231
you can blow up the car.
326
00:14:09,271 --> 00:14:11,421
- How do you know?
- He's done it.
327
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,341
Listen, Dad,
328
00:14:15,381 --> 00:14:17,680
Nick and I are gonna go down
to Nick's dad's place,
329
00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:19,840
and we're gonna find something
that I can afford.
330
00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:21,350
And we're gonna make this trip.
331
00:14:21,390 --> 00:14:22,862
That's all I have to say.
332
00:14:29,101 --> 00:14:31,090
Joe, Joe, I...
want to talk to you.
333
00:14:31,130 --> 00:14:32,591
Hey, Steven,
always good to see you.
334
00:14:32,631 --> 00:14:34,360
Let me get the papers,
you'll sign them,
335
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,361
and then we'll split
a bag of pork rinds.
336
00:14:36,401 --> 00:14:38,361
Uh, Joe...
337
00:14:38,401 --> 00:14:40,730
I didn't come to sign.
338
00:14:40,770 --> 00:14:43,301
Then no pork rinds.
339
00:14:43,341 --> 00:14:45,301
Joe, I need your help.
340
00:14:45,341 --> 00:14:47,301
Man to man...
341
00:14:47,341 --> 00:14:49,171
father to father.
342
00:14:49,211 --> 00:14:52,192
Which is it, Steve?
343
00:14:54,293 --> 00:14:57,111
Joe, the kids are coming
down here to buy a car,
344
00:14:57,151 --> 00:14:59,651
and I don't want you
to sell it to them.
345
00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:02,490
Uh, Steven, you don't seem
to have a firm grasp
346
00:15:02,530 --> 00:15:04,490
of what I do here.
347
00:15:04,530 --> 00:15:06,491
Joe...
348
00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:08,660
I don't think Nick
and Mallory should go
349
00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:09,930
on this cross-country trip.
350
00:15:09,970 --> 00:15:11,700
I'm worried about the kids.
351
00:15:11,740 --> 00:15:14,231
Hey, hey. I understand you.
352
00:15:14,271 --> 00:15:16,801
I understand you
because we're both fathers.
353
00:15:16,841 --> 00:15:19,240
And in a way,
that bonds me and you
354
00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:21,570
even stronger
than a wedding vow.
355
00:15:21,610 --> 00:15:23,971
That's lovely, Joe.
356
00:15:24,011 --> 00:15:26,310
A little scary.
357
00:15:26,350 --> 00:15:28,580
Yeah, but lovely nonetheless.
358
00:15:28,620 --> 00:15:30,581
I know, I know.
I haven't done a...
359
00:15:30,621 --> 00:15:32,481
a terrific job of, uh,
controlling Nick
360
00:15:32,521 --> 00:15:35,150
because I haven't had
a chance to be with him.
361
00:15:35,190 --> 00:15:37,204
Because I abandoned him.
362
00:15:40,573 --> 00:15:42,460
No, but a daughter is different.
363
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:45,000
If Nick were Nicotina,
364
00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:48,031
I wouldn't let him do half
of the stuff that he does.
365
00:15:48,071 --> 00:15:49,631
- What does he do?
- I don't know.
366
00:15:49,671 --> 00:15:52,101
What does he do?
I never see him.
367
00:15:52,141 --> 00:15:54,270
Joe, look, the kids
don't have enough money
368
00:15:54,310 --> 00:15:55,871
to go anyplace else.
369
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:58,010
They're coming here,
so I'm asking you
370
00:15:58,050 --> 00:15:59,841
not to sell them a car.
371
00:15:59,881 --> 00:16:01,311
What am I supposed to tell them
372
00:16:01,351 --> 00:16:03,180
when they walk
into this glorious showroom
373
00:16:03,220 --> 00:16:05,402
and they see
all these automobiles?
374
00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:18,700
Joe, I'm gonna ask you
to do something
375
00:16:18,740 --> 00:16:20,631
that's gonna be very hard
for you to do.
376
00:16:20,671 --> 00:16:22,100
I want you to lie.
377
00:16:22,140 --> 00:16:25,270
Lie? Happily.
378
00:16:25,310 --> 00:16:28,663
Thought you were gonna ask me
to give blood or something.
379
00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:33,026
Ooh...
380
00:16:37,096 --> 00:16:39,081
- Hey, son.
- Hey.
381
00:16:39,121 --> 00:16:40,990
- Mallory.
- Hi, Joe.
382
00:16:41,030 --> 00:16:43,250
Um, I'm sorry the first car
didn't work out,
383
00:16:43,290 --> 00:16:47,221
but we'd like to look at
something, um, less expensive.
384
00:16:47,261 --> 00:16:48,730
You know, I-I been thinking.
385
00:16:48,770 --> 00:16:51,200
I don't see
what you need with a car.
386
00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:53,130
All the problems
and the responsibilities,
387
00:16:53,170 --> 00:16:54,930
the expenses, car insurance.
388
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:57,540
A car is a big pain in the butt.
389
00:16:57,580 --> 00:16:58,870
I'm talking to them.
390
00:16:58,910 --> 00:17:00,040
They're young and attractive.
391
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:01,340
They can get around.
392
00:17:01,380 --> 00:17:03,094
Who's gonna take you anywhere?
393
00:17:09,228 --> 00:17:13,481
Dad, we got $1,500.
394
00:17:13,521 --> 00:17:15,490
This is a quality establishment.
395
00:17:15,530 --> 00:17:18,220
We don't have anything
for $1,500.
396
00:17:18,260 --> 00:17:20,860
Well, what about this car here?
It says $1,300 on the sticker.
397
00:17:20,900 --> 00:17:24,548
It's $1,300 a week.
398
00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:32,040
Well, well, Joe, that-that
just about, uh, wraps up
399
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:35,010
the research
on my new documentary, um...
400
00:17:35,050 --> 00:17:39,341
<i>Floor Mats: We Never Get
to Look Out the Window.</i>
401
00:17:39,381 --> 00:17:41,480
Dad, what are you doing here?
402
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:43,650
Well, I...
403
00:17:43,690 --> 00:17:45,650
You came down here
to talk Joe out
404
00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:47,380
of selling me a car, didn't you?
405
00:17:47,420 --> 00:17:48,951
He did nothing of the kind.
406
00:17:48,991 --> 00:17:50,351
All right, I did.
407
00:17:50,391 --> 00:17:52,815
You're a very hard guy
to get a fix on.
408
00:17:55,207 --> 00:17:57,360
I understand your position now.
409
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,230
You have this irrational desire
410
00:17:59,270 --> 00:18:01,570
to deprive me
of any joy in my life.
411
00:18:01,610 --> 00:18:04,424
Let's get out of here, Nick.
412
00:18:06,552 --> 00:18:09,141
And then Nixon says...
413
00:18:09,181 --> 00:18:12,080
Alex, stop. I don't want
an alternate ending to my play.
414
00:18:12,120 --> 00:18:14,093
Just give it a chance, okay?
415
00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:19,020
Nixon...
416
00:18:19,060 --> 00:18:21,320
steps up to the podium
417
00:18:21,360 --> 00:18:23,904
and addresses
the American people.
418
00:18:28,340 --> 00:18:31,344
"My fellow Americans...
419
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:38,840
"I can't thank you enough
for your mandate
420
00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:41,855
"to make me president for life.
421
00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:49,580
"But more importantly,
let me broach this subject:
422
00:18:49,620 --> 00:18:52,450
"Jennifer Keaton's play
423
00:18:52,490 --> 00:18:56,451
"is the worst thing
I have ever read.
424
00:18:56,491 --> 00:19:00,160
"And let me just say this
about that:
425
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:04,177
"When I think
of Jennifer's play...
426
00:19:09,548 --> 00:19:12,540
"...one word comes to mind.
427
00:19:12,580 --> 00:19:14,553
"P.U.
428
00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:21,211
"Go see anything else.
429
00:19:21,251 --> 00:19:23,410
<i>"Fiddler on the Roof,</i>
430
00:19:23,450 --> 00:19:25,750
<i>“Hello, Dolly!</i>
431
00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:29,690
"or just stay home
and watch reruns of <i>Flubber</i>.
432
00:19:29,730 --> 00:19:31,860
"In conclusion, Jennifer,
433
00:19:31,900 --> 00:19:34,690
"and let me make this
perfectly clear,
434
00:19:34,730 --> 00:19:37,244
"I am ashamed of you.
435
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:43,070
"And did I mention,
436
00:19:43,110 --> 00:19:45,070
I hate your play."
437
00:19:45,110 --> 00:19:47,086
The end.
438
00:19:53,759 --> 00:19:56,080
What? What? What?
439
00:19:56,120 --> 00:19:59,081
Alex, that was complete nonsense
from beginning to end.
440
00:19:59,121 --> 00:20:01,250
Oh, oh, well, excuse me,
441
00:20:01,290 --> 00:20:05,690
Little Miss I Wrote One Play
and Now I'm Shakespeare.
442
00:20:05,730 --> 00:20:07,390
Alex, you know what?
I'm not using yours.
443
00:20:07,430 --> 00:20:09,230
There's only one copy
of one Nixon play
444
00:20:09,270 --> 00:20:11,100
that I am taking
to school with me,
445
00:20:11,140 --> 00:20:13,112
and it's upstairs
on my desk right now.
446
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:19,370
Oh, I'm pooped.
447
00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:22,729
I'm just gonna...
I'm gonna take a little nap.
448
00:20:24,089 --> 00:20:26,592
Alex, don't you dare
touch my Nixon play.
449
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:41,561
Well... Elyse.
450
00:20:41,601 --> 00:20:42,960
Hi.
451
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:44,730
Mallory hates me.
452
00:20:44,770 --> 00:20:46,800
What's going on?
453
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:51,201
I was so upset about Mallory
taking this trip with Nick
454
00:20:51,241 --> 00:20:53,801
that, uh, before they went down
to see Joe,
455
00:20:53,841 --> 00:20:55,310
I went down there first
456
00:20:55,350 --> 00:20:57,610
and tried to convince him
not to sell them a car,
457
00:20:57,650 --> 00:21:00,331
and Mallory found me hiding
on the floor of a Camaro.
458
00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:05,781
Well, o-o-obviously...
459
00:21:05,821 --> 00:21:07,937
you-you meant to do the...
460
00:21:08,967 --> 00:21:10,851
Steven, how could you?
461
00:21:10,891 --> 00:21:12,871
How could you?
462
00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:20,520
I'll be upstairs watching
<i>Nixon Masterpiece Theater</i>.
463
00:21:24,550 --> 00:21:27,401
I suppose the last thing
you want to do is talk to me,
464
00:21:27,441 --> 00:21:30,195
but really, I think we should.
465
00:21:32,191 --> 00:21:34,241
You tried to stop me
from doing something
466
00:21:34,281 --> 00:21:35,880
I have every right to do.
467
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,650
You went back on your word,
and you did it in front of Joe,
468
00:21:38,690 --> 00:21:41,290
the man who will one day be
my father-in-law.
469
00:21:41,330 --> 00:21:43,790
If that's not bad enough,
470
00:21:43,830 --> 00:21:46,060
you treated me like a teenager.
471
00:21:46,100 --> 00:21:49,075
You snuck around behind my back,
and you humiliated me in public.
472
00:21:50,576 --> 00:21:52,930
I agree with everything
you said,
473
00:21:52,970 --> 00:21:54,947
except the father-in-law part.
474
00:21:57,616 --> 00:21:59,701
Dad, I am an adult now.
475
00:21:59,741 --> 00:22:01,710
I'm grown-up.
476
00:22:01,750 --> 00:22:04,724
You really have to start
respecting my judgment.
477
00:22:06,692 --> 00:22:08,281
It's just, for-for 20 years,
478
00:22:08,321 --> 00:22:10,211
I've had this job
as your father,
479
00:22:10,251 --> 00:22:12,251
to protect you,
480
00:22:12,291 --> 00:22:14,520
worry about you,
481
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:16,621
and it-it's just...
482
00:22:16,661 --> 00:22:19,160
it's hard to wake up one day
and say,
483
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:21,261
"Well, Mallory's an adult now.
484
00:22:21,301 --> 00:22:23,776
Stop worrying about her."
485
00:22:25,110 --> 00:22:27,701
It's nice to know
that-that you worry about me.
486
00:22:27,741 --> 00:22:29,870
I mean, it's comforting.
487
00:22:29,910 --> 00:22:32,871
I mean, I know, when I was a kid
and I had a problem,
488
00:22:32,911 --> 00:22:34,201
I would always come to you
489
00:22:34,241 --> 00:22:35,840
because I thought you had
all the answers.
490
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:39,110
You know, I used to love it
when you'd come to me.
491
00:22:39,150 --> 00:22:41,211
Particularly since Alex
never did.
492
00:22:41,251 --> 00:22:44,380
He was always telling me to
cut my hair, get a decent job
493
00:22:44,420 --> 00:22:47,070
and stop listening to
that loud rock and roll music.
494
00:22:49,868 --> 00:22:53,520
Dad, don't you know
there's never going to be a time
495
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,960
when I won't come to you?
496
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,760
I mean, I'm always gonna want
to know what you think,
497
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:00,530
and not just
'cause you're my dad,
498
00:23:00,570 --> 00:23:02,684
but because I really like you.
499
00:23:04,683 --> 00:23:06,856
I like you, too.
500
00:23:08,453 --> 00:23:10,941
You know, I've been thinking.
501
00:23:10,981 --> 00:23:13,680
As your father,
I want to be supportive of you
502
00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:16,571
and the decisions you make,
so...
503
00:23:17,930 --> 00:23:20,342
I've decided to cosign
for that loan.
504
00:23:21,667 --> 00:23:23,190
Thanks, Dad.
505
00:23:23,230 --> 00:23:26,320
Um, I think I should get it
on my own, though.
506
00:23:26,360 --> 00:23:29,319
If I can't swing it,
I'll just have to wait.
507
00:23:30,342 --> 00:23:32,261
You're no dope, Mallory.
508
00:23:32,301 --> 00:23:34,848
Runs in the family, Dad.
|
1
00:00:02,620 --> 00:00:08,364
СЕМЕЙНЫЕ УЗЫ
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7 сезон, 15 серия
«Пока её папаша не заберёт Тандербёрд»
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Что пишешь, Джен?
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Пьесу по истории о последних
днях президентства Никсона.
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О, комедия.
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Всего понемногу, мам.
И смех, и слёзы.
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Назвала «Я не баловник...
Ну ладно, возможно».
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– Однако.
– Вот, послушай.
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<i>Обсудив всё с Конгрессом
и другими руководителями,</i>
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<i>я пришёл к выводу,
что вопрос Уотергейта...</i>
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Дик!
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Дик, наконец-то
ты пришёл за мной!
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Дик?
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Алекс, угомонись.
Это плёнка.
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Я пишу пьесу
об отставке Никсона.
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Джен, это же отлично.
Отлично.
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Ты понимаешь, что пишешь
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о величайшем президенте
в истории нашей страны?
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Погоди-ка, Алекс.
Ты говорил то же про Рейгана.
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00:01:54,105 --> 00:01:57,848
Я свидетельница.
Так кто: Никсон или Рейган?
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Вот задачка. Ух!
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У Никсона...
лучше физическая форма.
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Почему Мэллори ещё не дома?
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Какая разница?
Нам легче дышится.
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Гуляет, наверное, с Ником.
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Ведь знает, что машина
нужна мне к четырём.
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Их двое, могли бы уж
определить время.
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Да, если Ник возьмёт на себя большую
стрелку, а Мэллори – маленькую...
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Не.
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– Привет.
– Здоров.
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Здоров.
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Вы представляете, сколько
сейчас времени, юная леди?
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Нет.
Ник, ты знаешь?
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Хорошо, хоть Дарвин
не дожил до этого.
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Просил же вернуть машину к четырём.
У меня сегодня важное дело.
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Пап, мы старались, но собрание
«Художники за мир» задержалось.
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Я за мир не меньше других, но
мне нужно купить новые калоши.
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Пап, это смешно.
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Так много водителей в доме,
и так мало машин.
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Точно. Через пару месяцев
я получу права,
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и мне тоже нужна будет машина.
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А 11-го августа 2003-го
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мне понадобится машина, чтобы
отвезти Мэрион Дэвис в кино.
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Обещала сходить со мной
как-нибудь в следующем веке.
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Пап, я тут скопила денег. Должно
хватить на классную машинку.
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А мой батя владеет самым
большим и самым засуженным
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салоном подержанных авто
на Среднем Западе.
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Идея неплохая. Ещё одна
машина нам пригодится.
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Точно.
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Класс. Тогда мы с Ником
сходим в салон, подберём.
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Не торопитесь.
Я пойду с вами.
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В таких местах легко
могут облапошить.
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Пап, это же отец Ника.
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Как раз причиной больше.
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00:03:54,101 --> 00:03:55,910
Билл вами займётся.
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Поздравляю с покупкой.
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Здоров.
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Здоров!
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– Здоров.
– Здрасьте.
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<i>Hola.</i>
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Джо, вы помните
моего папу Стивена?
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Да, да, рад снова видеть.
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Всегда в радость.
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Это, бать, Мэл пришла
купить машину.
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У-ла-ла!
Вы пришли по адресу.
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О, мне нравится эта.
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Нет, дорогуша.
В ней работает только бардачок.
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Не хотим вас долго отвлекать.
Перейдём сразу к делу.
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Да что вы, к какому делу?
Давайте расслабимся.
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Посудачим немного.
Мы ж семья.
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Ну да, оба мы из рода
человеческого.
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Стивен, я к тому, что вы никогда
ни от чего меня не отвлечёте.
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Давай, садись.
Расскажи о жизни.
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– Ну, как бы всё...
– Есть у меня для вас тачила.
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Вот эта очень даже неплоха.
Выглядит внушительно.
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Пап, да она будто
из Каменного века.
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Машина хорошая.
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О, а мне эта нравится.
Уютненькая «Карманн-Джия».
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Мэл, что-то я сомневаюсь.
А она точно безопасна?
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Безопасна ли?
Даю вам слово.
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Сам на ней мотался
по мелким судебным тяжбам.
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Много, заметьте, наездил.
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Она просто чумовая.
Сколько стоит?
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Мэл, Мэл, ты что?
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Тут нужно быть спокойным.
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Машина чумовая.
Сколько стоит?
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Для вас?
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35 сотен.
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Не дороговато ли?
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Ладно, подойдите.
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Вот что я сделаю.
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Отдам вам эту красотку
ровно за 3 тысячи.
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Ничего подобного
раньше не делал.
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И всё потому, что люблю вас.
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Наша любовь взаимна.
Две с половиной.
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Уже люблю чуть меньше.
По рукам.
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Мэл, она твоя
за две с половиной тысячи.
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Пап, у меня нет столько.
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Не вопрос, Мэллори.
Сходи в банк и оформи кредит.
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Нет, мне не дадут.
Подберём что-нибудь другое.
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А что если я выступлю
поручителем?
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Правда?
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Ты лучший папочка
в целом мире!
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Крутяк. Ты лучший
батя в целом мире.
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Я-то тебе не выступал
поручителем.
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Алекс, не надо мне помогать.
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Брось, Джен. Тебе наверняка
нужны ещё первоисточники.
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У меня уже есть «Последние дни»
Вудворда и Бернстина,
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запись уотергейтских слушаний
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и несколько копий
«Вашингтон Пост».
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Это, конечно, хорошо, Джен.
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00:07:23,778 --> 00:07:29,158
Но у меня имеется куда более
надёжная публикация.
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00:07:29,198 --> 00:07:34,148
«Никси».
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Официальный журнал
фан-клуба Ричарда Никсона,
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членом-основателем которого
я являюсь с 1967-го года.
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Единственный членом
с 1967-го года.
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Боже мой, кому интересно смотреть
на него в плавательном костюме?
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С прищепкой на носу.
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00:07:51,955 --> 00:07:54,210
Джен. Разверни страницу.
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00:08:00,774 --> 00:08:07,634
Да брось, он отлично смотрится
на медвежьей шкуре.
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00:08:07,674 --> 00:08:09,505
Здоров!
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00:08:09,545 --> 00:08:11,375
Здоров, здоров.
Куда ходили?
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00:08:11,415 --> 00:08:14,505
– В торговый центр.
– Отдел автоаксессуаров.
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Смотри, сколько всего накупила.
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«Шопоголик за рулём».
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А для комфорта в машине –
чехлы из овчины.
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И штаны в пару.
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00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:35,780
А для косметических
нужд в дороге –
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зеркало для козырька...
в полный рост.
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Чудесно, Мэл.
Глядя в него во время езды,
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будешь красивейшей девушкой
в куче разбитых машин.
132
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Пап, я так тебе благодарна.
Люблю тебя.
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00:08:54,125 --> 00:08:57,470
Ради таких моментов
отцы и живут.
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00:08:58,530 --> 00:09:00,668
Бать, я тоже тебя люблю.
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00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:04,374
Момент прошёл, Ник.
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00:09:05,790 --> 00:09:06,995
Здоров.
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00:09:07,035 --> 00:09:08,625
– Здоров.
– Здрасьте.
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00:09:08,665 --> 00:09:11,595
– <i>Hola</i>.
– А?
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00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:14,605
Хорошая новость.
Ваш кредит на машину одобрен.
140
00:09:14,645 --> 00:09:16,505
Вот документы на подпись.
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00:09:16,545 --> 00:09:18,135
Не лучше ли прочитать сначала?
142
00:09:18,175 --> 00:09:20,805
Вы правы. Стоит взглянуть.
143
00:09:20,845 --> 00:09:24,575
Хотя чего уж, давайте
я сам взгляну за вас.
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О нет, о чём я тут думал?
145
00:09:28,185 --> 00:09:31,215
Не могу поступить так
со знакомыми людьми.
146
00:09:31,255 --> 00:09:34,585
И даже с незнакомыми.
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00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:37,925
Видишь это?
Меня за это посадят.
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00:09:37,965 --> 00:09:40,095
Поверьте, уже сажали.
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00:09:40,135 --> 00:09:42,225
Это пародия.
150
00:09:42,265 --> 00:09:45,095
Никакой порядочности.
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00:09:45,135 --> 00:09:47,765
Ну вот, пожалуйста.
Чистый документ.
152
00:09:47,805 --> 00:09:52,005
Ваши подписи – и авто ваше.
153
00:09:52,045 --> 00:09:54,010
Мэллори?
154
00:10:00,690 --> 00:10:02,545
Стивен, твоя ручка.
155
00:10:02,585 --> 00:10:04,415
Спасибо.
156
00:10:04,455 --> 00:10:06,015
Ник, так же классно!
157
00:10:06,055 --> 00:10:08,985
Наконец-то съездим
в наше путешествие мечты.
158
00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:11,025
Точно. Удачи вам.
159
00:10:11,065 --> 00:10:13,425
Какое путешествие?
160
00:10:13,465 --> 00:10:15,065
Папа я уже всё спланировала.
161
00:10:15,105 --> 00:10:18,195
В весенние каникулы мы
с Ником объедем всю страну.
162
00:10:18,235 --> 00:10:20,295
Поглазеем на С-Ш-А.
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00:10:20,335 --> 00:10:26,470
А после махнём на юг от границы,
прямиком в Род-Айленд.
(один из штатов США)
164
00:10:26,510 --> 00:10:29,220
Что-то я не в восторге
от вашей задумки.
165
00:10:29,260 --> 00:10:33,405
Давайте подпишем бумажки,
а поездку позже обсудим.
166
00:10:33,445 --> 00:10:37,585
Мэллори, я не хочу, чтобы ты
шаталась по всей стране.
167
00:10:37,625 --> 00:10:40,515
Так-так-погодьте,
мы не будем шататься.
168
00:10:40,555 --> 00:10:43,055
Мы будем ездить.
169
00:10:43,095 --> 00:10:48,165
Стиви, я слыхал, у тебя
очень красивая подпись.
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00:10:48,205 --> 00:10:50,395
Продемонстрируй нам.
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00:10:50,435 --> 00:10:51,565
Нет.
172
00:10:51,605 --> 00:10:54,235
Пап, в чём проблема?
Подпиши бумаги.
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00:10:54,275 --> 00:10:56,105
– Не хочу.
– Почему?
174
00:10:56,145 --> 00:10:57,605
Я против поездки.
175
00:10:57,645 --> 00:10:59,975
Зачем ты так?
176
00:11:00,015 --> 00:11:02,600
Я могу делать, что захочу.
Мне уже 20 лет!
177
00:11:02,650 --> 00:11:08,715
Неужели?
А мне уже 40!
178
00:11:08,755 --> 00:11:13,180
Миссис Китон, вам должна быть
знакома подпись мужа.
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00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:15,863
«В свой последний рабочий день
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00:11:15,903 --> 00:11:18,158
Никсон обратился
к сотрудникам Белого дома.
181
00:11:18,198 --> 00:11:19,325
Никсон:
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00:11:19,365 --> 00:11:22,025
„Друзья, мы уходим
с большими надеждами,
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00:11:22,065 --> 00:11:26,600
глубоким смирением
и китайским сервизом на 8 персон“.
184
00:11:29,340 --> 00:11:33,010
Никсон идёт к вертолёту
и натыкается на Форда:
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00:11:33,050 --> 00:11:37,288
„Извините,
если понимаете, о чём я“».
186
00:11:37,328 --> 00:11:43,580
Дженнифер, как ты могла?
Он был с нами всё это время.
187
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:45,655
Идёмте, мистер президент.
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00:11:45,695 --> 00:11:47,785
Поднимемся, и я расскажу вам
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00:11:47,825 --> 00:11:51,040
обо всём плохом,
что натворила Дженнифер.
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00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:54,320
И никакого ей прощения!
191
00:11:57,680 --> 00:12:02,665
Элиза, ты давно видела Мэллори?
192
00:12:02,705 --> 00:12:04,935
Она по-прежнему здесь живёт.
193
00:12:04,975 --> 00:12:07,545
Не знаю. Со мной она
больше не общается.
194
00:12:07,585 --> 00:12:09,705
Стивен, ты огорчил её.
195
00:12:09,745 --> 00:12:12,715
Сказал, что выступишь
поручителем, и передумал.
196
00:12:12,755 --> 00:12:14,885
Конечно, я теперь крайний.
197
00:12:14,925 --> 00:12:16,385
Хорошо.
198
00:12:16,425 --> 00:12:19,780
В 19 лет разве мы не ездили
из Беркли в Вашингтон
199
00:12:19,820 --> 00:12:21,130
на Рождество?
200
00:12:21,170 --> 00:12:24,465
Ездили. И это довело твоего
отца до белого каления.
201
00:12:24,505 --> 00:12:27,665
Да. Но разве оно того не стоило?
202
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:31,715
Наши ночи под звёздами...
203
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:38,205
Только мы вдвоём
в старом рваном спальнике.
204
00:12:38,245 --> 00:12:40,705
– Да.
– Да.
205
00:12:40,745 --> 00:12:43,475
Боже мой, Элиза.
Твой папа был прав.
206
00:12:43,515 --> 00:12:46,475
Беру свои слова обратно.
Все свои слова.
207
00:12:46,515 --> 00:12:49,360
Мы были скверными,
скверными детьми.
208
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:53,938
Привет, мам.
209
00:12:53,978 --> 00:12:57,551
Здоров, миссис Китон.
Здоров, мистер Китон.
210
00:12:57,591 --> 00:13:00,095
А, точняк.
211
00:13:00,135 --> 00:13:04,765
Мистер Китон,
мы объявили вам бойкот.
212
00:13:04,805 --> 00:13:07,805
Поэтому я не могу сейчас
с вами разговаривать.
213
00:13:07,845 --> 00:13:11,335
Но уверен, что в ближайшем будущем
мы сможем общаться, как раньше.
214
00:13:11,375 --> 00:13:12,805
Обсуждать...
215
00:13:12,845 --> 00:13:15,505
Ник, когда начинается
твой бойкот?
216
00:13:15,545 --> 00:13:18,545
Хотелось бы уже, чтоб побыстрее.
217
00:13:18,585 --> 00:13:22,115
Не-не, он идёт. Уже.
Наверно, вы не поняли.
218
00:13:22,155 --> 00:13:24,785
Тихо! Ты не должен
разговаривать.
219
00:13:24,825 --> 00:13:26,355
Да не.
220
00:13:26,395 --> 00:13:29,785
Не, не, не, не, не.
Не, не, не, не, не, не.
221
00:13:29,825 --> 00:13:32,778
С вами, миссис Китон,
я могу разговаривать.
222
00:13:32,818 --> 00:13:37,073
Смысл в том, что разговоры
с мистером Китоном...
223
00:13:40,330 --> 00:13:42,305
...никакого смысла.
224
00:13:42,345 --> 00:13:46,375
Ник, милый, пошли наверх.
Дораспланируем каникулы.
225
00:13:46,415 --> 00:13:48,075
Что тут планировать?
226
00:13:48,115 --> 00:13:51,815
Будем только ты и я
в спальниках под звёздами.
227
00:13:51,855 --> 00:13:57,575
Вы скверные, скверные дети.
228
00:13:57,615 --> 00:14:00,755
Мэллори, ты не осознаёшь,
чем грозит эта поездка.
229
00:14:00,795 --> 00:14:04,655
Ты ничего не знаешь о машинах.
Это очень опасно.
230
00:14:04,695 --> 00:14:09,195
Если неправильно подключить
аккумулятор, машина взорвётся.
231
00:14:09,235 --> 00:14:13,785
– Откуда ты знаешь?
– Он так сделал.
232
00:14:13,825 --> 00:14:15,305
Папа.
233
00:14:15,345 --> 00:14:19,805
Мы пойдём к отцу Ника
и подберём машину по карману.
234
00:14:19,845 --> 00:14:22,830
И поедем в путешествие.
Больше мне нечего сказать.
235
00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:31,055
Джо, Джо, нужно поговорить.
236
00:14:31,095 --> 00:14:34,325
Стивен, всегда рад тебя видеть.
Я принесу бумаги, ты подпишешь,
237
00:14:34,365 --> 00:14:36,650
и мы разделим пакет
свиных рёбрышек.
238
00:14:36,690 --> 00:14:40,695
Джо, я пришёл не за этим.
239
00:14:40,735 --> 00:14:43,265
Тогда никаких рёбрышек.
240
00:14:43,305 --> 00:14:45,265
Джо, помоги мне.
241
00:14:45,305 --> 00:14:49,135
Как мужчина мужчине,
как отец отцу.
242
00:14:49,175 --> 00:14:54,240
Так кому именно, Стив?
243
00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:59,615
Дети едут к тебе за машиной.
Ты не должен им её продать.
244
00:14:59,655 --> 00:15:04,455
Стивен, ты видно не совсем
понимаешь, чем я тут занимаюсь.
245
00:15:04,495 --> 00:15:06,455
Джо.
246
00:15:06,495 --> 00:15:09,885
Нику и Мэллори не следует
ехать через всю страну.
247
00:15:09,925 --> 00:15:11,655
Я переживаю за детей.
248
00:15:11,695 --> 00:15:14,195
Эй, я тебя понимаю.
249
00:15:14,235 --> 00:15:16,765
Как отец, я понимаю тебя.
250
00:15:16,805 --> 00:15:21,535
И это связывает нас даже
сильнее, чем брачный обет.
251
00:15:21,575 --> 00:15:23,935
Очень мило, Джо.
252
00:15:23,975 --> 00:15:28,545
Немного пугающе,
но тем не менее мило.
253
00:15:28,585 --> 00:15:32,445
Да, я знаю, что не шибко-то
занимался воспитанием Ника.
254
00:15:32,485 --> 00:15:35,115
У меня не было
такой возможности.
255
00:15:35,155 --> 00:15:37,170
Я бросил его.
256
00:15:40,550 --> 00:15:44,955
Но дочери – другое дело.
Если бы Ник был Николетой,
257
00:15:44,995 --> 00:15:47,995
я б не позволил ему и половины
из того, что он делает.
258
00:15:48,035 --> 00:15:49,065
А что он делает?
259
00:15:49,105 --> 00:15:52,065
Понятия не имею.
Я никогда его не вижу.
260
00:15:52,105 --> 00:15:55,835
Джо, у них недостаточно денег,
чтобы пойти в другое место.
261
00:15:55,875 --> 00:15:59,805
Так что они придут сюда.
И я прошу: не продавай им машину.
262
00:15:59,845 --> 00:16:03,145
И что мне им сказать, когда они
войдут в этот сверкающий зал
263
00:16:03,185 --> 00:16:05,490
и увидят все эти автомобили?
264
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:22,065
Джо, я прошу тебя сделать
очень трудную вещь. Солги им.
265
00:16:22,105 --> 00:16:25,235
Солгать? С радостью.
266
00:16:25,275 --> 00:16:28,630
Думал, попросишь сдать кровь
или вроде того.
267
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:39,045
– Здоров, сын.
– Здоров.
268
00:16:39,085 --> 00:16:40,945
– Мэллори.
– Здравствуйте, Джо.
269
00:16:40,985 --> 00:16:43,965
Извините, что не вышло
с машиной,
270
00:16:44,005 --> 00:16:47,185
но мы хотим подобрать
что-то менее дорогое.
271
00:16:47,225 --> 00:16:50,845
Я вот тут думал.
А зачем вообще вам машина?
272
00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:54,895
Проблемы, ответственность,
расходы, страховка.
273
00:16:54,935 --> 00:16:57,495
Машина – это геморрой
на вашу задницу.
274
00:16:57,535 --> 00:16:58,835
Это я им.
275
00:16:58,875 --> 00:17:01,305
Они молоды, привлекательны.
Могут прославиться.
276
00:17:01,345 --> 00:17:04,020
А вы кому нужны?
277
00:17:09,210 --> 00:17:13,445
Бать, у нас 1,500 долларов.
278
00:17:13,485 --> 00:17:18,185
Это приличное заведение.
У нас нет ничего за такие деньги.
279
00:17:18,225 --> 00:17:20,815
Вот же машина.
На ценнике 1,300.
280
00:17:20,855 --> 00:17:24,520
1,300 в неделю.
281
00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:34,965
Да, Джо, этого мне и недоставало
для моей новой документалки.
282
00:17:35,005 --> 00:17:39,305
«Коврики. Мы никогда
не посмотрим в окно».
283
00:17:39,345 --> 00:17:41,445
Что ты тут делаешь?
284
00:17:41,485 --> 00:17:43,605
Коврики вот...
285
00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:47,345
Пришёл подговорить Джо
не продавать мне машину?
286
00:17:47,385 --> 00:17:48,915
Ничего подобного.
287
00:17:48,955 --> 00:17:50,388
Да, так и есть.
288
00:17:50,428 --> 00:17:55,150
Сложно тебя понять.
289
00:17:55,190 --> 00:17:57,325
Теперь я понимаю.
290
00:17:57,365 --> 00:18:01,525
У тебя абсурдное желание лишить
меня всякой радости жизни.
291
00:18:01,565 --> 00:18:04,510
Ник, пойдём отсюда.
292
00:18:06,510 --> 00:18:09,105
«И после Никсон говорит...»
293
00:18:09,145 --> 00:18:12,018
Алекс, хватит. Моей пьесе
не нужна другая концовка.
294
00:18:12,058 --> 00:18:16,308
Дай мне шанс, хорошо?
295
00:18:16,348 --> 00:18:20,670
«Никсон подымается на трибуну
296
00:18:20,710 --> 00:18:26,200
и обращается
к американскому народу.
297
00:18:28,576 --> 00:18:34,680
„Мои дорогие американцы.
298
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:39,115
Безмерно вам благодарен за то,
что вы наделили меня мандатом
299
00:18:39,155 --> 00:18:43,710
на пожизненное президентство.
300
00:18:43,770 --> 00:18:49,545
Но, что более важно,
позвольте сказать следующее.
301
00:18:49,585 --> 00:18:56,415
Пьеса Дженнифер Китон –
есть худшее, что я когда-либо читал.
302
00:18:56,455 --> 00:19:00,115
Позвольте сказать это и о том.
303
00:19:00,155 --> 00:19:06,500
Когда я думаю о её пьесе...
304
00:19:09,530 --> 00:19:12,860
...на ум приходит лишь одно слово:
305
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:17,609
ФУ.
306
00:19:17,649 --> 00:19:21,175
Сходите на что-нибудь другое.
307
00:19:21,215 --> 00:19:25,715
«Скрипач на крыше»,
«Привет, Долли».
308
00:19:25,755 --> 00:19:29,645
Или останьтесь дома
и пересмотрите «Флаббера».
309
00:19:29,685 --> 00:19:34,638
И в заключение, Дженнифер,
хочу, чтобы ты знала.
310
00:19:34,678 --> 00:19:39,515
Мне стыдно за тебя.
311
00:19:42,020 --> 00:19:49,608
И, как я упомянул,
я ненавижу твою пьесу“. Конец».
312
00:19:53,740 --> 00:19:56,045
Ну что? Что? Что?
313
00:19:56,085 --> 00:19:59,045
Алекс, это полный бред
от начала до конца.
314
00:19:59,085 --> 00:20:01,215
Неужели? Ну простите,
315
00:20:01,255 --> 00:20:05,655
маленькая мисс «Я написала
одну пьесу, и теперь я Шекспир».
316
00:20:05,695 --> 00:20:08,105
Алекс, я просто не возьму
твою версию в школу.
317
00:20:08,145 --> 00:20:11,055
Есть только один экземпляр
истинной пьесы о Никсоне,
318
00:20:11,095 --> 00:20:13,080
и он сейчас наверху
на моём столе.
319
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:19,318
Что-то я подустал.
320
00:20:19,358 --> 00:20:23,815
Пойду, что ль, вздремну немного.
321
00:20:23,855 --> 00:20:28,437
Смотри не смей трогать
мою пьесу.
322
00:20:38,390 --> 00:20:41,525
Добрый вечер, Элиза.
323
00:20:41,565 --> 00:20:42,925
Привет.
324
00:20:42,965 --> 00:20:44,695
Мэллори меня ненавидит.
325
00:20:44,735 --> 00:20:46,755
Что случилось?
326
00:20:46,795 --> 00:20:54,758
Я так обеспокоился их поездкой,
что пришёл к Джо раньше них
327
00:20:54,798 --> 00:20:57,565
и уговорил его
не продавать машину.
328
00:20:57,605 --> 00:21:01,865
А Мэллори обнаружила меня
на полу «Камаро».
329
00:21:02,910 --> 00:21:07,910
Что ж, очевидно, что ты хотел...
330
00:21:08,950 --> 00:21:13,840
Стивен, как, как ты мог?
331
00:21:17,190 --> 00:21:20,490
Я наверху, смотрю «Никсоновский
театральный шедевр».
332
00:21:24,530 --> 00:21:27,365
Наверно, меньше всего
ты хочешь говорить со мной.
333
00:21:27,405 --> 00:21:30,170
Но поговорить нам нужно.
334
00:21:31,755 --> 00:21:35,840
Ты пытался помешать мне сделать то,
на что я имею полное право.
335
00:21:35,885 --> 00:21:41,498
Отступился от слов перед Джо –
моим возможным будущим тестем.
336
00:21:41,538 --> 00:21:46,015
Если этого мало, ты обращался
со мной, как с ребёнком.
337
00:21:46,055 --> 00:21:49,050
Провернул аферу за моей спиной
и прилюдно обидел.
338
00:21:50,223 --> 00:21:57,540
Согласен со всем сказанным,
кроме части про тестя.
339
00:21:57,588 --> 00:22:01,665
Пап, я уже взрослая.
Я выросла.
340
00:22:01,705 --> 00:22:04,820
Тебе пора начать считаться
с моей позицией.
341
00:22:06,109 --> 00:22:10,170
Понимаешь, 20 лет
я работал твоим отцом.
342
00:22:10,215 --> 00:22:14,475
Защищал, беспокоился.
343
00:22:14,515 --> 00:22:19,115
Тяжело встать в один
день и сказать:
344
00:22:19,155 --> 00:22:23,735
«Всё, Мэллори теперь взрослая.
Хватит переживать за неё».
345
00:22:23,775 --> 00:22:27,655
Приятно знать, что ты
переживаешь.
346
00:22:27,695 --> 00:22:29,825
Это успокаивает.
347
00:22:29,865 --> 00:22:33,988
Когда в детстве со мной что-то
случалось, я шла к тебе.
348
00:22:34,028 --> 00:22:35,805
Думала, что ты знаешь всё.
349
00:22:35,845 --> 00:22:39,075
И мне это очень нравилось.
350
00:22:39,115 --> 00:22:41,478
Отчасти потому,
что Алекс такого не делал.
351
00:22:41,518 --> 00:22:44,530
Говорил только, чтоб я подстригся,
нашёл приличную работу
352
00:22:44,570 --> 00:22:48,370
и перестал слушать этот
шумный рок-н-ролл.
353
00:22:49,503 --> 00:22:55,920
Пап, я ведь всегда буду
обращаться к тебе.
354
00:22:55,965 --> 00:22:58,725
Мне всегда будет интересно
твоё мнение.
355
00:22:58,765 --> 00:23:00,613
И не только потому,
что ты мой отец.
356
00:23:00,653 --> 00:23:02,650
Потому что я люблю тебя.
357
00:23:04,660 --> 00:23:06,830
Я тоже тебя люблю.
358
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,905
Я вот подумал,
359
00:23:10,945 --> 00:23:16,648
и, как отец, я хочу поддержать
тебя и твои решения, так что...
360
00:23:16,688 --> 00:23:20,310
я решил подписать
бумаги на кредит.
361
00:23:21,376 --> 00:23:26,160
Спасибо, пап. Но я должна
разобраться с машиной сама.
362
00:23:26,203 --> 00:23:29,279
Если не могу позволить сейчас,
значит подожду.
363
00:23:29,319 --> 00:23:32,220
Ты умная девочка, Мэл.
364
00:23:32,265 --> 00:23:34,820
Это у нас семейное.
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