1
00:00:03,421 --> 00:00:04,536
Coffee.
2
00:00:04,901 --> 00:00:07,017
-Thank you.
-Cappuccino.
3
00:00:08,301 --> 00:00:11,179
And a nice hot cider for Monica.
4
00:00:11,421 --> 00:00:12,490
Thank you.
5
00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:14,097
Rach?
6
00:00:14,581 --> 00:00:17,015
Why does my cinnamon stick
have an eraser?
7
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,340
That's why.
8
00:00:23,341 --> 00:00:24,694
Sorry.
9
00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:29,131
The One With the Stoned Guy
10
00:01:21,621 --> 00:01:22,849
Chandler?
11
00:01:23,941 --> 00:01:26,171
Miss Tedlock, you're looking
lovely today.
12
00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:29,811
May I say that is a very
flattering sleeve length on you?
13
00:01:31,701 --> 00:01:35,694
Mr. Costilick would like you to stop
by his office at the end of the day.
14
00:01:36,421 --> 00:01:39,970
If this is about those prank memos,
I had nothing to do with them.
15
00:01:40,221 --> 00:01:42,018
Nothing at all. Really.
16
00:01:42,541 --> 00:01:43,337
Nothing.
17
00:01:47,101 --> 00:01:48,454
Hey, you guys! You guys!
18
00:01:48,701 --> 00:01:51,374
Chandler's coming and he says
he has incredible news.
19
00:01:51,621 --> 00:01:54,931
So when he gets here,
let's all act, like, you know--
20
00:01:55,621 --> 00:01:58,340
Never mind. But it was gonna
be really good.
21
00:01:59,221 --> 00:02:00,574
What's going on?
22
00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:03,381
So it's a typical day at work.
I'm inputting my numbers. . .
23
00:02:03,621 --> 00:02:08,331
. . .and Big Al tells me he wants
to make me processing supervisor.
24
00:02:08,581 --> 00:02:10,572
-That is great!
-Congratulations!
25
00:02:10,821 --> 00:02:11,856
So. . .
26
00:02:12,141 --> 00:02:12,937
. . .I quit.
27
00:02:13,421 --> 00:02:14,740
Why?
28
00:02:14,941 --> 00:02:16,977
Why? This was supposed to be
a temp job.
29
00:02:17,221 --> 00:02:19,940
Chandler, you've been there
for five years.
30
00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:24,174
I know, but if I took it, it would
be admitting that this is what I do.
31
00:02:24,421 --> 00:02:25,570
Was it a lot more money?
32
00:02:25,821 --> 00:02:29,734
Doesn't matter. I just don't want
to be a guy who sits in his office. . .
33
00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:31,533
. . .worrying about the WENUS.
34
00:02:34,981 --> 00:02:36,175
''The WENUS?''
35
00:02:36,541 --> 00:02:40,056
Weekly estimated net usage system.
It's a processing term.
36
00:02:40,781 --> 00:02:42,578
Oh, that WENUS.
37
00:02:44,101 --> 00:02:45,136
What are you gonna do?
38
00:02:45,341 --> 00:02:47,377
I don't know. That's the thing.
39
00:02:47,581 --> 00:02:49,617
But I won't figure it out
working there.
40
00:02:49,861 --> 00:02:51,977
I have something you can do!
41
00:02:52,221 --> 00:02:54,291
I have this new massage client, Steve.
42
00:02:55,981 --> 00:02:58,541
Anyway, he's opening up
a restaurant. . .
43
00:02:58,781 --> 00:03:01,136
. . .and he's looking for a head chef.
44
00:03:03,781 --> 00:03:04,850
Hi, there.
45
00:03:06,701 --> 00:03:10,057
I know. You're a chef, I know,
and I thought of you first.
46
00:03:10,301 --> 00:03:13,134
But Chandler's the one
who needs a job right now, so. . . .
47
00:03:15,221 --> 00:03:17,894
I just don't have a lot
of chefing experience.
48
00:03:18,301 --> 00:03:20,053
Unless it's an all-toast restaurant.
49
00:03:22,221 --> 00:03:24,018
What kind of food
is he looking for?
50
00:03:24,221 --> 00:03:26,940
He wants to do something eclectic,
so he's looking for someone. . .
51
00:03:27,181 --> 00:03:29,137
. . .who can create the entire menu.
52
00:03:29,341 --> 00:03:30,933
-Oh, my God!
-Yeah, I know!
53
00:03:31,181 --> 00:03:32,819
So what do you think?
54
00:03:34,421 --> 00:03:37,458
Thanks. I just don't see myself
in a big white hat.
55
00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:42,054
Oh, Monica! Guess what?
56
00:03:52,141 --> 00:03:54,097
Can you see my nipples
through this shirt?
57
00:03:56,821 --> 00:03:59,733
No, but don't worry.
I'm sure they're still there.
58
00:04:01,181 --> 00:04:02,534
Where you going, Mr. Suit-ey Man?
59
00:04:02,781 --> 00:04:07,332
I have an appointment to see Dr. Robert
Pilman, career counselor-a-go-go!
60
00:04:09,181 --> 00:04:10,694
I added the ''a-go-go. ''
61
00:04:11,181 --> 00:04:12,170
Career counselor?
62
00:04:12,421 --> 00:04:15,174
Hey, you guys all know
what you want to do.
63
00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:16,649
I don't.
64
00:04:17,301 --> 00:04:20,737
Hey, you guys in the living room
all know what you want to do.
65
00:04:21,021 --> 00:04:23,137
You know, you have goals,
you have dreams.
66
00:04:23,541 --> 00:04:24,530
I don't have a dream!
67
00:04:24,781 --> 00:04:27,932
The lesser known
''I Don't Have a Dream'' speech.
68
00:04:29,741 --> 00:04:32,255
Oh, I love my life! I love my life!
69
00:04:32,501 --> 00:04:33,934
Brian 's Song!
70
00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:38,129
The meeting went great?
71
00:04:38,381 --> 00:04:41,054
So great! He showed me
where the restaurant's gonna be.
72
00:04:41,301 --> 00:04:43,178
It's this cute little place on 1 0th.
73
00:04:43,421 --> 00:04:46,094
It's not too big, not too small.
It's just right.
74
00:04:46,301 --> 00:04:49,532
Was it formerly owned
by a blond woman and some bears?
75
00:04:50,301 --> 00:04:53,657
Anyway, I'm cooking for him
Monday night. Kind of an audition.
76
00:04:53,901 --> 00:04:56,779
He wants you to be here,
which will be great for me.
77
00:04:57,021 --> 00:04:58,295
You can make yummy noises.
78
00:04:58,621 --> 00:05:00,612
-What are you gonna make?
-Yummy noises.
79
00:05:02,781 --> 00:05:04,772
And, Monica, what are you gonna make?
80
00:05:05,021 --> 00:05:07,376
I don't know.
It's just got to be great.
81
00:05:07,621 --> 00:05:09,771
I know what you can make!
I know!
82
00:05:10,021 --> 00:05:12,694
You should make that thing
with the stuff.
83
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,257
You know. . .
84
00:05:15,501 --> 00:05:17,492
. . .that thing with the stuff?
85
00:05:19,181 --> 00:05:20,375
Okay, I don't know.
86
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:24,530
Anyone know a good date place
in the neighborhood?
87
00:05:25,341 --> 00:05:29,493
How about Tony's? If you can finish
a 32-ounce steak, it's free.
88
00:05:33,101 --> 00:05:36,332
Anyone know a good place
if you're not dating a puma?
89
00:05:37,701 --> 00:05:40,932
-Who are you going out with?
-Is this the bug lady?
90
00:05:41,421 --> 00:05:43,218
I love you, Ross.
91
00:05:45,141 --> 00:05:46,859
Her name's Celia.
She's not a bug lady.
92
00:05:47,101 --> 00:05:49,376
She's curator of insects
at the museum.
93
00:05:50,941 --> 00:05:52,090
What are you gonna do?
94
00:05:52,501 --> 00:05:55,732
I thought we'd go to dinner,
then bring her back to my place. . .
95
00:05:55,941 --> 00:05:58,330
. . .and I'd introduce her to my monkey.
96
00:06:00,741 --> 00:06:02,538
He's not speaking metaphorically.
97
00:06:05,541 --> 00:06:09,375
So back to your place?
You thinking maybe. . . .
98
00:06:12,221 --> 00:06:13,973
Well, I don't know. . . .
99
00:06:15,101 --> 00:06:16,295
I'm hoping. . . .
100
00:06:18,021 --> 00:06:20,137
I tell you, that monkey's
a chick magnet.
101
00:06:20,341 --> 00:06:24,653
She's gonna look at his furry, cute
little face and it'll seal the deal.
102
00:06:26,781 --> 00:06:29,341
Celia, don't worry.
He's not gonna hurt you!
103
00:06:29,581 --> 00:06:31,333
Soothing tones, soothing tones.
104
00:06:33,501 --> 00:06:35,093
Here, here.
You want some?
105
00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:37,140
I can't stand this.
106
00:06:37,381 --> 00:06:38,939
He's got his claws on my--
107
00:06:39,141 --> 00:06:40,494
Yeah, all right.
108
00:06:48,701 --> 00:06:50,737
Try this salmon mousse.
109
00:06:52,541 --> 00:06:53,337
Good.
110
00:06:53,541 --> 00:06:55,930
Is it better than
the other salmon mousse?
111
00:06:56,621 --> 00:06:57,736
It's creamier.
112
00:06:58,181 --> 00:07:00,297
Yeah? Well, is that better?
113
00:07:00,501 --> 00:07:03,811
I don't know.
We're talking about whipped fish.
114
00:07:04,621 --> 00:07:07,010
I'm just happy I'm keeping it down.
115
00:07:12,701 --> 00:07:14,293
God, what happened to you?
116
00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:17,334
Eight and a half hours
of aptitude tests. . .
117
00:07:17,541 --> 00:07:21,659
. . .intelligence tests, personality
tests, and what do I learn?
118
00:07:22,301 --> 00:07:26,852
''You're suited for data processing for
a large multi national corporation. ''
119
00:07:28,101 --> 00:07:31,332
That's so great because you
already know how to do that!
120
00:07:31,941 --> 00:07:33,659
Can you believe it?
121
00:07:33,861 --> 00:07:37,137
Don't I seem like I should
be doing something really cool?
122
00:07:37,381 --> 00:07:41,169
You know, I just always
pictured myself doing something. . . .
123
00:07:41,421 --> 00:07:42,570
Something!
124
00:07:42,821 --> 00:07:45,733
Oh, Chandler, I know, I know.
125
00:07:46,301 --> 00:07:49,293
You can see your nipples
through this shirt.
126
00:07:53,421 --> 00:07:55,491
Here you go.
Maybe this will cheer you up.
127
00:07:56,421 --> 00:08:00,539
I had a grape about five hours ago,
so I better split this with you.
128
00:08:01,861 --> 00:08:04,534
It's supposed to be that small.
It's a pre-appetizer.
129
00:08:04,741 --> 00:08:07,539
The French call it an amuse-bouche.
130
00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,572
Well, it is amusing.
131
00:08:20,581 --> 00:08:21,650
Oh, hi, Wendy.
132
00:08:22,221 --> 00:08:23,449
Yeah, 8:00.
133
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:25,820
What did we say, $ 1 0 an hour?
134
00:08:27,221 --> 00:08:28,336
Okay, great.
135
00:08:28,621 --> 00:08:30,577
All right, I'll see you then. Bye.
136
00:08:30,781 --> 00:08:32,214
Ten dollars an hour for what?
137
00:08:32,461 --> 00:08:34,850
I asked a waitress at work
to help me out.
138
00:08:35,421 --> 00:08:36,570
Waitressing?
139
00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:41,893
Of course I thought of you.
140
00:08:42,901 --> 00:08:43,936
But. . . .
141
00:08:44,381 --> 00:08:45,257
But. . . .
142
00:08:45,501 --> 00:08:46,297
But, but. . . .
143
00:08:48,021 --> 00:08:52,572
But, you see, it's just this thing
has to go just perfect, you know. . .
144
00:08:52,821 --> 00:08:56,655
. . .and, well, Wendy's more
of a professional waitress.
145
00:08:59,021 --> 00:09:03,572
And I'm maintaining my amateur status
so I can waitress in the Olympics.
146
00:09:07,101 --> 00:09:11,492
You know, I don't mean to brag, but
I waited tables at lnnsbruck in '7 6.
147
00:09:15,581 --> 00:09:16,980
Amuse-bouche?
148
00:09:33,821 --> 00:09:35,174
Talk to me.
149
00:09:39,701 --> 00:09:42,534
A weird thing happened to me
on the train this morning--
150
00:09:43,101 --> 00:09:44,853
Talk dirty.
151
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:51,460
-Here?
-Come on.
152
00:09:51,701 --> 00:09:52,736
Come on.
153
00:09:52,941 --> 00:09:54,420
Say something. . .
154
00:09:54,781 --> 00:09:56,180
. . .hot!
155
00:09:57,581 --> 00:09:58,696
What?
156
00:09:59,341 --> 00:10:00,330
What?
157
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:02,970
What?
158
00:10:04,301 --> 00:10:05,290
What?
159
00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:07,134
-What?
-Vulva.
160
00:10:14,421 --> 00:10:15,570
''Vulva?''
161
00:10:17,621 --> 00:10:19,737
All right, I panicked, all right?
162
00:10:19,981 --> 00:10:21,653
She took me by surprise.
163
00:10:21,861 --> 00:10:25,570
But it wasn't a total loss.
I mean, we ended up cuddling.
164
00:10:25,821 --> 00:10:28,540
Whoa, you cuddled? How many times?
165
00:10:29,941 --> 00:10:31,613
Shut up. It was nice.
166
00:10:32,221 --> 00:10:35,133
I just don't think I'm
the dirty-talking kind of guy.
167
00:10:35,341 --> 00:10:37,571
Just say what you want to do to her.
168
00:10:37,821 --> 00:10:39,777
Or what you want her to do to you.
169
00:10:40,101 --> 00:10:43,138
Or what you think other people
might be doing to each other.
170
00:10:43,581 --> 00:10:46,573
Look, I tell you what.
Try something on me.
171
00:10:49,021 --> 00:10:50,534
Please be kidding.
172
00:10:53,021 --> 00:10:54,136
Why not? Come on.
173
00:10:54,381 --> 00:10:58,010
Just close your eyes and tell me
what you'd like to be doing right now.
174
00:11:05,221 --> 00:11:07,018
I'm in my apartment. . . .
175
00:11:07,981 --> 00:11:08,857
Yeah, what else?
176
00:11:09,061 --> 00:11:11,700
You're not there.
We're not having this conversation!
177
00:11:12,181 --> 00:11:14,012
-All right. I'll start.
-Joey, please.
178
00:11:14,221 --> 00:11:16,371
Come on, come on.
All right, ready?
179
00:11:17,021 --> 00:11:18,295
Oh, Ross. . .
180
00:11:20,501 --> 00:11:23,334
. . .you get me so hot,
I want your lips on me now.
181
00:11:25,181 --> 00:11:26,011
See?
182
00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:30,729
Now you say something.
183
00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:32,579
I really don't think so.
184
00:11:32,821 --> 00:11:33,856
Come on.
185
00:11:34,301 --> 00:11:35,654
You like this woman?
186
00:11:35,901 --> 00:11:37,175
-You wanna see her again?
-Sure.
187
00:11:37,421 --> 00:11:40,254
If you can't talk dirty to me,
how will you talk dirty to her?
188
00:11:40,501 --> 00:11:42,890
Now tell me you want
to caress my butt!
189
00:11:47,821 --> 00:11:49,300
Okay, turn around.
190
00:11:50,621 --> 00:11:52,930
I don't want you staring at me
while I do this.
191
00:11:53,141 --> 00:11:55,735
All right, all right.
I'm not looking. Go ahead.
192
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:56,976
Okay.
193
00:12:00,221 --> 00:12:01,051
I want--
194
00:12:01,301 --> 00:12:03,337
Okay, I want. . .
195
00:12:03,581 --> 00:12:04,730
. . .to feel. . .
196
00:12:04,981 --> 00:12:07,700
. . .your hot, soft skin
with my lips.
197
00:12:08,181 --> 00:12:09,330
There you go.
198
00:12:10,621 --> 00:12:12,134
Keep going, keep going.
199
00:12:17,021 --> 00:12:19,137
I want to take my tongue and--
200
00:12:28,741 --> 00:12:29,696
Say it.
201
00:12:32,981 --> 00:12:34,050
Say it!
202
00:12:35,301 --> 00:12:38,373
--run it all over your body. . .
203
00:12:40,181 --> 00:12:42,376
. . .until you're trembling with--
204
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:01,936
With?
205
00:13:04,421 --> 00:13:06,412
-Funny story.
-You're not gonna believe this.
206
00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:07,855
It's okay. It's okay.
207
00:13:08,101 --> 00:13:11,138
I was always rooting for you
two kids to get together.
208
00:13:13,181 --> 00:13:16,014
While you were sleeping, that guy
from your old job called again.
209
00:13:16,261 --> 00:13:17,171
Again?
210
00:13:17,501 --> 00:13:20,334
-And again and again and again.
-And again.
211
00:13:25,301 --> 00:13:26,097
And again!
212
00:13:27,501 --> 00:13:31,050
Hey, Mr. Costilick.
How's life on the 1 5th floor?
213
00:13:32,141 --> 00:13:33,733
Yeah, I miss you too.
214
00:13:33,941 --> 00:13:37,536
It's a lot less satisfying
to steal pens from your own home.
215
00:13:39,781 --> 00:13:40,930
That's very generous.
216
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:43,537
But look, this isn't about the money.
217
00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:48,138
I need something more than a job.
I need something I really care about--
218
00:13:48,501 --> 00:13:51,334
That's on top of the year-end
bonus structure?
219
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:52,809
-Your dream!
-Your dream!
220
00:13:53,061 --> 00:13:56,337
Look, Al. Al, I'm not
playing hardball here, okay?
221
00:13:56,581 --> 00:13:59,379
This is not a negotiation.
This is a rejection!
222
00:14:01,581 --> 00:14:02,980
Stop saying numbers!
223
00:14:03,221 --> 00:14:06,531
I'm telling you, you've got
the wrong guy! You got the wrong guy!
224
00:14:06,781 --> 00:14:08,214
I'll see you Monday!
225
00:14:21,621 --> 00:14:23,737
Wow! It's huge!
226
00:14:23,941 --> 00:14:26,933
It's so much bigger than the cubicle.
227
00:14:27,141 --> 00:14:29,097
This is a cube!
228
00:14:29,581 --> 00:14:30,650
Look at this.
229
00:14:34,421 --> 00:14:36,139
You have a window!
230
00:14:37,501 --> 00:14:38,729
Yes, indeedy.
231
00:14:38,981 --> 00:14:43,133
-With a beautiful view of--
-Oh, look! That guy's peeing!
232
00:14:44,421 --> 00:14:47,493
Okay. That's enough of the view.
Check this out.
233
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,939
Okay, sit down here. Sit down.
234
00:14:50,141 --> 00:14:52,336
This is great. This is great.
235
00:14:52,901 --> 00:14:54,095
You ready?
236
00:14:55,381 --> 00:14:57,451
Helen, could you come in here
for a moment?
237
00:15:02,861 --> 00:15:04,135
Thank you, that'll be all.
238
00:15:06,621 --> 00:15:08,452
Last time I do that.
I promise.
239
00:15:13,821 --> 00:15:15,539
Wendy, we had a deal.
240
00:15:15,781 --> 00:15:17,373
Yeah, you promised.
241
00:15:24,581 --> 00:15:25,775
Who was that?
242
00:15:27,901 --> 00:15:29,095
Wendy bailed.
243
00:15:29,301 --> 00:15:30,939
I have no waitress.
244
00:15:32,621 --> 00:15:34,452
That's too bad.
245
00:15:34,941 --> 00:15:35,737
Bye-bye.
246
00:15:37,421 --> 00:15:38,934
-Ten dollars an hour!
-Nope.
247
00:15:39,301 --> 00:15:40,370
$ 1 2 an hour.
248
00:15:40,821 --> 00:15:43,972
I wish I could, but I've made plans
to walk around.
249
00:15:45,301 --> 00:15:48,259
When you ran out on your wedding,
I was there for you.
250
00:15:48,501 --> 00:15:52,210
I put a roof over your head,
and if that means nothing to you. . . .
251
00:15:52,981 --> 00:15:54,699
Twenty dollars an hour.
252
00:15:56,021 --> 00:15:56,976
Done.
253
00:16:03,621 --> 00:16:07,136
Well, hello! Welcome to Monica's!
May I take your coat?
254
00:16:10,501 --> 00:16:12,412
-Hi, Steve.
-Hello, Monica.
255
00:16:12,621 --> 00:16:14,339
Hello, greeter girl.
256
00:16:15,301 --> 00:16:17,292
-This is Rachel.
-Yeah, okay.
257
00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:21,737
Everything smells so delicious.
258
00:16:21,941 --> 00:16:26,059
I can't remember a time I smelled
such a delicious combination of--
259
00:16:26,301 --> 00:16:27,495
Okay, smells.
260
00:16:28,981 --> 00:16:30,972
It's a lovely apartment.
261
00:16:31,221 --> 00:16:33,132
Thank you. Would you like a tour?
262
00:16:33,381 --> 00:16:35,941
I was just being polite,
but all right.
263
00:16:39,101 --> 00:16:40,056
What's up?
264
00:16:40,301 --> 00:16:44,260
In the cab on the way over,
Steve blazed up a doobie.
265
00:16:45,621 --> 00:16:46,417
What?
266
00:16:47,101 --> 00:16:50,332
Smoked a joint, you know?
Lit a bone. Weed, hemp, ganja.
267
00:16:52,581 --> 00:16:54,572
Okay, I'm with you, Cheech.
268
00:16:56,301 --> 00:16:58,292
Is it dry in here?
269
00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:03,537
Let me get you some wine.
270
00:17:03,821 --> 00:17:06,255
I think we're ready
for our first course too.
271
00:17:09,181 --> 00:17:11,331
These are rock shrimp ravioli. . .
272
00:17:11,581 --> 00:17:13,651
. . .in a cilantro ponzu sauce. . .
273
00:17:13,901 --> 00:17:16,131
. . .with just a touch of minced. . .
274
00:17:21,221 --> 00:17:22,336
. . .ginger.
275
00:17:23,181 --> 00:17:25,456
Well, smack my ass and call me Judy!
276
00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:30,534
These are fantastic!
277
00:17:30,781 --> 00:17:33,215
Oh, gosh! I'm so glad you liked them.
278
00:17:33,501 --> 00:17:35,617
Like them? I couId eat 100 of them!
279
00:17:38,821 --> 00:17:40,857
That's all there is of these. . .
280
00:17:41,101 --> 00:17:44,252
. . .but in about 8 1 /2 minutes,
we'll serve some tartlets.
281
00:17:44,821 --> 00:17:46,140
''Tartlets?''
282
00:17:46,621 --> 00:17:48,020
''Tartlets. ''
283
00:17:49,021 --> 00:17:50,454
''Tartlets. ''
284
00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:54,298
Word has lost all meaning.
285
00:18:00,421 --> 00:18:03,140
Excuse me. Can I help you
with anything?
286
00:18:03,381 --> 00:18:05,736
You know, I don't know
what I'm looking for.
287
00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:23,014
Oh, cool! Taco shells!
288
00:18:25,701 --> 00:18:28,932
These are-- They are like a little
corn envelope, you know?
289
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:31,575
You don't want to spoil your appetite.
290
00:18:32,581 --> 00:18:33,809
Sugar-O's!
291
00:18:34,101 --> 00:18:37,332
You know, if you just wait
another 6 1 /2 minutes--
292
00:18:37,581 --> 00:18:39,617
Macaroni and cheese!
We gotta make this!
293
00:18:44,821 --> 00:18:46,300
No, we don't.
294
00:18:49,381 --> 00:18:50,416
Sorry.
295
00:18:54,781 --> 00:18:56,931
Why don't you just have a seat here?
296
00:19:02,661 --> 00:19:03,696
Give me the Gummy Bears.
297
00:19:08,181 --> 00:19:09,057
Give them to me.
298
00:19:09,261 --> 00:19:10,171
We'll share.
299
00:19:10,381 --> 00:19:12,611
-No. Give me the bears.
-You can't have any.
300
00:19:12,821 --> 00:19:13,731
Give them to me!
301
00:19:13,941 --> 00:19:15,135
This is not working.
302
00:19:16,221 --> 00:19:18,894
Bears overboard! They're drowning!
303
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:23,057
Hey, fellas! Grab onto a Sugar-O!
Save yourselves!
304
00:19:23,301 --> 00:19:26,737
Help! Help! I'm drowning! Help!
305
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,014
That's it! Dinner is over!
306
00:19:30,261 --> 00:19:31,137
-What?
-''What?''
307
00:19:31,381 --> 00:19:32,814
-Why?
-''Why?''
308
00:19:33,061 --> 00:19:35,211
I've waited seven years
for an opportunity like this. . .
309
00:19:35,421 --> 00:19:38,572
. . .and you can't even wait
4 1/2 minutes for a tartlet?
310
00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:50,090
What a tool.
311
00:19:51,541 --> 00:19:53,736
You don't want to work
for a guy like that.
312
00:19:53,981 --> 00:19:57,974
I know. It's just I just thought
that this was, you know, ''it. ''
313
00:19:58,221 --> 00:19:59,939
You'll get there.
You're an amazing chef.
314
00:20:00,341 --> 00:20:02,775
You know those yummy noises?
I wasn't faking.
315
00:20:10,821 --> 00:20:12,971
So how did it go with Celia?
316
00:20:14,341 --> 00:20:16,332
I was unbelievable.
317
00:20:16,541 --> 00:20:17,940
All right, Ross!
318
00:20:18,621 --> 00:20:21,340
I was the James Michener
of dirty talk.
319
00:20:21,581 --> 00:20:23,856
It was the most elaborate filth
you have ever heard.
320
00:20:24,101 --> 00:20:27,252
I mean, there were characters,
plot lines. . .
321
00:20:27,741 --> 00:20:29,174
. . .themes, a motif.
322
00:20:29,421 --> 00:20:32,015
At one point, there were villagers.
323
00:20:33,781 --> 00:20:34,691
And. . . .
324
00:20:36,501 --> 00:20:39,538
Well, by the time we finished
with all the dirty talk. . .
325
00:20:39,781 --> 00:20:42,215
. . .it was late and we were
both exhausted, so. . . .
326
00:20:42,461 --> 00:20:44,929
-You cuddled.
-Yeah, which was nice.
327
00:20:45,421 --> 00:20:47,935
Do you guys want to try to catch
a late movie?
328
00:20:48,621 --> 00:20:50,179
Shouldn't we wait for Chandler?
329
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:52,619
Whoa! Where the hell is he?
330
00:20:53,101 --> 00:20:54,978
Yes, Fran, I know what time it is. . .
331
00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:58,338
. . .but I'm looking at the WENUS
and I'm not happy!
332
00:20:59,421 --> 00:21:01,252
Oh, really?
Let me tell you something.
333
00:21:01,501 --> 00:21:05,938
You will care about it because
I care about it. Got it? Good!
334
00:21:21,141 --> 00:21:22,256
How's this?
335
00:21:23,021 --> 00:21:25,216
Sorry. How about over here?
336
00:21:25,421 --> 00:21:27,139
That just means it's working.
337
00:21:27,381 --> 00:21:29,337
Does this hurt?
338
00:21:29,781 --> 00:21:31,339
How about this?
339
00:21:32,141 --> 00:21:33,494
There you go!
340
00:21:40,421 --> 00:21:41,410
Oh, the throb!
|
1
00:00:03,421 --> 00:00:04,536
Кофе.
2
00:00:04,901 --> 00:00:07,017
- Спасибо.
- Капучино.
3
00:00:08,301 --> 00:00:11,179
И славный горячий сидр для Моники.
4
00:00:11,421 --> 00:00:12,490
Спасибо.
5
00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:14,097
Рэйч?
6
00:00:14,581 --> 00:00:17,015
Почему на моей коричной
палочке резинка?
7
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,340
Ой! Вот почему.
8
00:00:23,341 --> 00:00:24,694
Извини.
9
00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:29,131
Эпизод с обкуренным парнем.
10
00:01:21,621 --> 00:01:22,849
Чэндлер?
11
00:01:23,941 --> 00:01:26,171
Мисс Тедлок, сегодня вы выглядите
просто очаровательно.
12
00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:29,811
Позвольте заметить, что вам очень
идет рукав такой длины.
13
00:01:31,701 --> 00:01:35,694
Мистер Костилик просил вас
зайти в конце рабочего дня.
14
00:01:36,421 --> 00:01:39,970
Если это по поводу записок с розыгрышами,
я не имею к ним никакого отношения.
15
00:01:40,221 --> 00:01:42,018
Совершенно никакого. В самом деле.
16
00:01:42,541 --> 00:01:43,337
Никакого.
17
00:01:47,101 --> 00:01:48,454
Эй, ребята! Ребята!
18
00:01:48,701 --> 00:01:51,374
Сейчас придет Чэндлер. Он сказал, что у него
просто невероятные новости.
19
00:01:51,621 --> 00:01:54,931
Давайте, когда он войдет,
вести себя так, будто --
20
00:01:55,621 --> 00:01:58,340
А, ладно. Но было бы прикольно.
21
00:01:59,221 --> 00:02:00,574
Так в чем дело?
22
00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:03,381
Итак, обычный рабочий день.
Я ввожу свои цифирки...
23
00:02:03,621 --> 00:02:08,331
и вдруг Большой Эл предлагает мне должность
начальника отдела обработки данных.
24
00:02:08,581 --> 00:02:10,572
- Это же здорово!
- Поздравляю!
25
00:02:10,821 --> 00:02:11,856
Поэтому...
26
00:02:12,141 --> 00:02:12,937
я ухожу.
27
00:02:13,421 --> 00:02:14,740
Почему?
28
00:02:14,941 --> 00:02:16,977
Почему? По идее, это была
временная работа.
29
00:02:17,221 --> 00:02:19,940
Чэндлер, ты работаешь
там уже 5 лет.
30
00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:24,174
Да я знаю, но если бы я согласился, то это означало
бы,
что именно этим я и хочу заниматься.
31
00:02:24,421 --> 00:02:25,570
А денег намного больше предложили?
32
00:02:25,821 --> 00:02:29,734
Не важно. Я просто не хочу быть человеком,
который сидит в своем офисе...
33
00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:31,533
и переживает о ЧЛЕНе.
34
00:02:34,981 --> 00:02:36,175
О ЧЛЕНе?
35
00:02:36,541 --> 00:02:40,056
"Частотность локальных еженедельных недостач".
Это термин из обработки данных.
36
00:02:40,781 --> 00:02:42,578
А, об этом ЧЛЕНе.
37
00:02:44,101 --> 00:02:45,136
Так что ты будешь делать?
38
00:02:45,341 --> 00:02:47,377
Я не знаю. В этом-то и дело.
39
00:02:47,581 --> 00:02:49,617
И я ничего не решу,
если буду работать там.
40
00:02:49,861 --> 00:02:51,977
У меня есть кое-что для тебя!
41
00:02:52,221 --> 00:02:54,291
У меня новый клиент на массаж, Стив.
42
00:02:55,981 --> 00:02:58,541
Короче, он открывает ресторан...
43
00:02:58,781 --> 00:03:01,136
и ему нужен шеф-повар.
44
00:03:03,781 --> 00:03:04,850
Э-эй!
45
00:03:06,701 --> 00:03:10,057
Я знаю, что ты - повар,
и сначала я подумала о тебе.
46
00:03:10,301 --> 00:03:13,134
Но сейчас-то работа нужна
именно Чэндлеру, так что...
47
00:03:15,221 --> 00:03:17,894
У меня просто мало опыта
в качестве шеф-повара.
48
00:03:18,301 --> 00:03:20,053
Только если это не ресторан тостов.
49
00:03:22,221 --> 00:03:24,018
Какие блюда его интересуют?
50
00:03:24,221 --> 00:03:26,940
Он хочет сделать что-то эклектичное,
поэтому ему нужен кто-то,
51
00:03:27,181 --> 00:03:29,137
кто может создать все меню целиком.
52
00:03:29,341 --> 00:03:30,933
- Бог ты мой!
- Ага, я знаю!
53
00:03:31,181 --> 00:03:32,819
Так что скажешь?
54
00:03:34,421 --> 00:03:37,458
Спасибо. Просто я не представляю себя
в большом белом колпаке.
55
00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:42,054
Эй, Моника! Знаешь, что?
56
00:03:52,141 --> 00:03:54,097
У меня просвечивают
соски через рубашку?
57
00:03:56,821 --> 00:03:59,733
Нет, но не волнуйся -
я знаю, что они на месте.
58
00:04:01,181 --> 00:04:02,534
Куда это ты собрался, мистер в пиджаке?
59
00:04:02,781 --> 00:04:07,332
У меня встреча с доктором Робертом Пилманом,
консультантом по карьере, тынц-тынц-тынц.
60
00:04:09,181 --> 00:04:10,694
"Тынц-тынц" - это я от себя добавил.
61
00:04:11,181 --> 00:04:12,170
С консультантом по карьере?
62
00:04:12,421 --> 00:04:15,174
Слушайте, вы все знаете,
чем хотите заниматься.
63
00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:16,649
Я не знаю.
64
00:04:17,301 --> 00:04:20,737
Слушайте, вы все, которые в гостиной,
знаете, чем хотите заниматься.
65
00:04:21,021 --> 00:04:23,137
Понимаете, у вас есть
цели, есть мечты.
66
00:04:23,541 --> 00:04:24,530
А у меня нет мечты!
67
00:04:24,781 --> 00:04:27,932
Менее известная речь под названием
"У меня нет мечты".
68
00:04:29,741 --> 00:04:32,255
Ах, я люблю свою жизнь! Я люблю свою жизнь!
69
00:04:32,501 --> 00:04:33,934
Как в песне Брайана!
70
00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:38,129
Ну и как прошло?
71
00:04:38,381 --> 00:04:41,054
Замечательно! Он показал мне,
где будет ресторан.
72
00:04:41,301 --> 00:04:43,178
Такое миленькое местечко на 10 улице.
73
00:04:43,421 --> 00:04:46,094
Помещение не слишком большое,
не слишком маленькое, а самое то.
74
00:04:46,301 --> 00:04:49,532
А там раньше не жила
блондинка с медведями?
75
00:04:50,301 --> 00:04:53,657
В любом случае, я готовлю для него в понедельник
вечером. Что-то типа пробы в кино.
76
00:04:53,901 --> 00:04:56,779
И, Фиби, он хочет, чтобы ты тоже
там была, что мне только на руку.
77
00:04:57,021 --> 00:04:58,295
Ты будешь издавать аппетитные звуки.
78
00:04:58,621 --> 00:05:00,612
- Что ты будешь готовить?
- Аппетитные звуки.
79
00:05:02,781 --> 00:05:04,772
А ты, Моника, что будешь готовить?
80
00:05:05,021 --> 00:05:07,376
Я не знаю.
Но что-то отменное.
81
00:05:07,621 --> 00:05:09,771
Я знаю что!
Я знаю!
82
00:05:10,021 --> 00:05:12,694
Ты должна приготовить
эту фаршированную штуку.
83
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,257
Понимаешь...
84
00:05:15,501 --> 00:05:17,492
... фаршированную штуку?
85
00:05:19,181 --> 00:05:20,375
Ладно. Я не знаю.
86
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:24,530
Кто-нибудь знает хорошее место поблизости,
куда можно сходить на свидание?
87
00:05:25,341 --> 00:05:29,493
Как насчет "У Тони"? Если сможешь съесть
килограммовый стейк, то за него не платишь.
88
00:05:33,101 --> 00:05:36,332
Кто-нибудь знает хорошее место,
если свидание не с пумой?
89
00:05:37,701 --> 00:05:40,932
- А с кем ты идешь?
- Это дама с жуками?
90
00:05:41,421 --> 00:05:43,218
Росс, я люблю тебя.
91
00:05:45,141 --> 00:05:46,859
Ее зовут Селия.
И она - не дама с жуками.
92
00:05:47,101 --> 00:05:49,376
Она куратор отдела
насекомых в музее.
93
00:05:50,941 --> 00:05:52,090
И что вы собираетесь делать?
94
00:05:52,501 --> 00:05:55,732
Я думаю, мы поужинаем,
потом я приведу ее к себе
95
00:05:55,941 --> 00:05:58,330
и познакомлю со своим зверьком.
96
00:06:00,741 --> 00:06:02,538
И он говорит не иносказательно.
97
00:06:05,541 --> 00:06:09,375
То есть, пойдете к тебе?
Как ты думаешь, может быть....
98
00:06:12,221 --> 00:06:13,973
Ну, не знаю...
99
00:06:15,101 --> 00:06:16,295
Надеюсь...
100
00:06:18,021 --> 00:06:20,137
Я тебе говорю: эта обезьяна
притягивает женщин как магнит.
101
00:06:20,341 --> 00:06:24,653
Стоит ей только взглянуть на его симпатичную
мохнатую мордочку и дело в шляпе.
102
00:06:26,781 --> 00:06:29,341
Селия, не волнуйся, не кричи!
Он тебя не обидит!
103
00:06:29,581 --> 00:06:31,333
Ласковым голосом, ласковым.
104
00:06:33,501 --> 00:06:35,093
Вот так, вот так. Хочешь?
105
00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:37,140
Я не могу этого вынести.
106
00:06:37,381 --> 00:06:38,939
Он запустил когти мне в...
107
00:06:39,141 --> 00:06:40,494
Ну ладно.
108
00:06:48,701 --> 00:06:50,737
Попробуй мой лососевый мусс.
109
00:06:52,541 --> 00:06:53,337
Вкусно.
110
00:06:53,541 --> 00:06:55,930
Он вкуснее, чем другой мусс?
111
00:06:56,621 --> 00:06:57,736
Он сливочнее.
112
00:06:58,181 --> 00:07:00,297
Да? Так он вкуснее?
113
00:07:00,501 --> 00:07:03,811
Не знаю.
Речь ведь о взбитой рыбе.
114
00:07:04,621 --> 00:07:07,010
Хорошо, хоть в желудке могу ее удержать.
115
00:07:12,701 --> 00:07:14,293
Боже, что с тобой случилось?
116
00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:17,334
Восемь с половиной часов тестов
на проверку способностей...
117
00:07:17,541 --> 00:07:21,659
тесты интеллекта, личностные
тесты, и что я узнаю?
118
00:07:22,301 --> 00:07:26,852
"Вы подходите для выполнения задач по обработке
данных в большой международной корпорации".
119
00:07:28,101 --> 00:07:31,332
Это ведь просто здорово,
потому что ты уже умеешь это!
120
00:07:31,941 --> 00:07:33,659
Можете себе представить?
121
00:07:33,861 --> 00:07:37,137
Разве я не похож на человека, который должен
заниматься чем-то по-настоящему крутым?
122
00:07:37,381 --> 00:07:41,169
Знаешь, я ведь всегда
представлял себя делающим что-то...
123
00:07:41,421 --> 00:07:42,570
Что-то!
124
00:07:42,821 --> 00:07:45,733
Ай, Чэндлер, да знаю я, знаю.
125
00:07:46,301 --> 00:07:49,293
Твои соски просвечивает
сквозь рубашку.
126
00:07:53,421 --> 00:07:55,491
Вот. Может, это поднимет
тебе настроение.
127
00:07:56,421 --> 00:08:00,539
Я уже съел виноградину 5 часов назад,
так что давай разделим это на двоих.
128
00:08:01,861 --> 00:08:04,534
Но они и должны быть такими маленькими.
Это закуска перед закуской.
129
00:08:04,741 --> 00:08:07,539
Французы называют это "развлечение для рта".
130
00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,572
Что ж, мой рот развлекся.
131
00:08:20,581 --> 00:08:21,650
О, привет, Венди.
132
00:08:22,221 --> 00:08:23,449
Да, в 8 часов.
133
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:25,820
Как мы договорились, 10 долларов в час?
134
00:08:27,221 --> 00:08:28,336
Замечательно.
135
00:08:28,621 --> 00:08:30,577
Хорошо, увидимся. Пока.
136
00:08:30,781 --> 00:08:32,214
10 долларов в час за что?
137
00:08:32,461 --> 00:08:34,850
Я попросила официантку
с работы помочь мне.
138
00:08:35,421 --> 00:08:36,570
С обслуживанием?
139
00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:41,893
Конечно, я подумала о тебе.
140
00:08:42,901 --> 00:08:43,936
Но...
141
00:08:44,381 --> 00:08:45,257
Но...
142
00:08:45,501 --> 00:08:46,297
Но, но?
143
00:08:48,021 --> 00:08:52,572
Но, видишь ли, все должно
пройти просто идеально,
144
00:08:52,821 --> 00:08:56,655
а Венди, она... э-э... все-таки
профессиональная официантка.
145
00:08:59,021 --> 00:09:03,572
А я сохраняю статус любителя, чтобы быть официанткой
на олимпийских играх?
146
00:09:07,101 --> 00:09:11,492
Знаете, не хочу хвастаться, но я обслуживал
столики в Иннсбруке, в 1976 году.
147
00:09:15,581 --> 00:09:16,980
Развлечение для рта?
148
00:09:33,821 --> 00:09:35,174
Поговори со мной.
149
00:09:39,701 --> 00:09:42,534
Странный случай произошел со мной сегодня утром
в вагоне метро ---
150
00:09:43,101 --> 00:09:44,853
О непристойном.
151
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:51,460
- Здесь?
- Ну давай же.
152
00:09:51,701 --> 00:09:52,736
Давай.
153
00:09:52,941 --> 00:09:54,420
Скажи что-нибудь...
154
00:09:54,781 --> 00:09:56,180
... возбуждающее!
155
00:09:57,581 --> 00:09:58,696
Что?
156
00:09:59,341 --> 00:10:00,330
Что?
157
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:02,970
Что?
158
00:10:04,301 --> 00:10:05,290
Что?
159
00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:07,134
- Что?
- Вульва.
160
00:10:14,421 --> 00:10:15,570
"Вульва"?
161
00:10:17,621 --> 00:10:19,737
Да ладно, я запаниковал, ясно?
162
00:10:19,981 --> 00:10:21,653
Это было для меня полной неожиданностью.
163
00:10:21,861 --> 00:10:25,570
Но это был не полный провал.
В смысле, мы все равно потом начали обниматься.
164
00:10:25,821 --> 00:10:28,540
Ух ты, обниматься? И сколько раз?
165
00:10:29,941 --> 00:10:31,613
Замолчи. Было приятно.
166
00:10:32,221 --> 00:10:35,133
Просто мне кажется, что я не могу говорить о похабном.
167
00:10:35,341 --> 00:10:37,571
Просто скажи, чем ты хочешь с ней заняться.
168
00:10:37,821 --> 00:10:39,777
Или чем ты хочешь, чтобы она занялась с тобой.
169
00:10:40,101 --> 00:10:43,138
Или о том, чем по-твоему могут заниматься другие.
170
00:10:43,581 --> 00:10:46,573
Ладно, слушай.
Попробуй сказать что-нибудь такое мне.
171
00:10:49,021 --> 00:10:50,534
Пожалуйста, скажи, что ты шутишь.
172
00:10:53,021 --> 00:10:54,136
Почему нет? Давай.
173
00:10:54,381 --> 00:10:58,010
Просто закрой глаза и скажи мне, чем бы ты хотел
заняться прямо сейчас.
174
00:11:05,221 --> 00:11:07,018
Я в своей квартире...
175
00:11:07,981 --> 00:11:08,857
Так, что еще?
176
00:11:09,061 --> 00:11:11,700
Тебя там нет.
И мы не говорим об этом!
177
00:11:12,181 --> 00:11:14,012
- Ну хорошо. Я начну.
- Джоуи, прошу тебя.
178
00:11:14,221 --> 00:11:16,371
Давай, давай.
Итак, готов?
179
00:11:17,021 --> 00:11:18,295
О, Росс...
180
00:11:20,501 --> 00:11:23,334
... ты меня так заводишь. Я так хочу, чтобы ты
прикоснулся ко мне губами.
181
00:11:25,181 --> 00:11:26,011
Ясно?
182
00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:30,729
Теперь твоя очередь.
183
00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:32,579
Как-то действительно не хочется.
184
00:11:32,821 --> 00:11:33,856
Давай же.
185
00:11:34,301 --> 00:11:35,654
Тебе нравится эта девушка?
186
00:11:35,901 --> 00:11:37,175
- Хочешь продолжать встречаться с ней?
- А то.
187
00:11:37,421 --> 00:11:40,254
Если ты не можешь говорить о похабном со мной,
как же ты будешь говорить о похабном с ней?
188
00:11:40,501 --> 00:11:42,890
Скажи мне, что хочешь поласкать мою задницу.
189
00:11:47,821 --> 00:11:49,300
Ладно, отвернись.
190
00:11:50,621 --> 00:11:52,930
Не хочу, чтобы ты на меня пялился, пока я буду
говорить.
191
00:11:53,141 --> 00:11:55,735
Хорошо, хорошо.
Я не смотрю. Давай.
192
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:56,976
Хорошо.
193
00:12:00,221 --> 00:12:01,051
Я хочу --
194
00:12:01,301 --> 00:12:03,337
Хорошо, я хочу...
195
00:12:03,581 --> 00:12:04,730
прикоснуться...
196
00:12:04,981 --> 00:12:07,700
... губами к твоей горячей нежной коже.
197
00:12:08,181 --> 00:12:09,330
Ну вот.
198
00:12:10,621 --> 00:12:12,134
Давай, продолжай.
199
00:12:17,021 --> 00:12:19,137
Своим языком я хочу ---
200
00:12:28,741 --> 00:12:29,696
Говори!
201
00:12:32,981 --> 00:12:34,050
Говори же!
202
00:12:35,301 --> 00:12:38,373
-- облизать тебя с ног до головы...
203
00:12:40,181 --> 00:12:42,376
... пока ты не начнешь дрожать от --
204
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:01,936
От?
205
00:13:04,421 --> 00:13:06,412
- ...от смеха.
- Ты не поверишь.
206
00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:07,855
Да ладно, ладно.
207
00:13:08,101 --> 00:13:11,138
Я всегда был за то, чтобы
вы, детки, были вместе.
208
00:13:13,181 --> 00:13:16,014
Пока ты спал, опять звонил этот
парень с твоей бывшей работы.
209
00:13:16,261 --> 00:13:17,171
Опять?
210
00:13:17,501 --> 00:13:20,334
- И опять, и опять, и опять.
- И опять.
211
00:13:25,301 --> 00:13:26,097
И опять!
212
00:13:27,501 --> 00:13:31,050
Здравствуйте, мистер Костилик.
Как жизнь на 15-ом этаже?
213
00:13:32,141 --> 00:13:33,733
Ага, я тоже скучаю.
214
00:13:33,941 --> 00:13:37,536
Когда крадешь ручки из собственного дома, это
приносит намного меньше удовольствия.
215
00:13:39,781 --> 00:13:40,930
Это очень щедро.
216
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:43,537
Послушайте, дело не в деньгах.
217
00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:48,138
Мне нужна не просто работа.
Мне нужно что-то, что мне действительно небезразлично
--
218
00:13:48,501 --> 00:13:51,334
И это вдобавок к обычной премии в конце года?
219
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:52,809
- Твоя мечта!
- Твоя мечта!
220
00:13:53,061 --> 00:13:56,337
Послушайте, Эл. Эл, я не набиваю себе цену, понимаете?
221
00:13:56,581 --> 00:13:59,379
Это - не переговоры!
Это отказ!
222
00:14:01,581 --> 00:14:02,980
Перестаньте называть всякие цифры!
223
00:14:03,221 --> 00:14:06,531
Я вам говорю, я не тот, кто вам нужен! Я не тот,
кто вам нужен!
224
00:14:06,781 --> 00:14:08,214
До понедельника!
225
00:14:21,621 --> 00:14:23,737
Ого! Да он огромный!
226
00:14:23,941 --> 00:14:26,933
Это намного больше, чем просто кубик.
227
00:14:27,141 --> 00:14:29,097
Это ж целый куб!
228
00:14:29,581 --> 00:14:30,650
Ты только посмотри.
229
00:14:34,421 --> 00:14:36,139
У тебя есть окно!
230
00:14:37,501 --> 00:14:38,729
Ух ты, точно.
231
00:14:38,981 --> 00:14:43,133
- С прекрасным видом на ---
- О, глянь-ка! Этот парень писает!
232
00:14:44,421 --> 00:14:47,493
Ладно, с видом закончили.
Вот сейчас что покажу.
233
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,939
Ладно, садись сюда. Садись.
234
00:14:50,141 --> 00:14:52,336
Это здорово. Просто здорово.
235
00:14:52,901 --> 00:14:54,095
Готова?
236
00:14:55,381 --> 00:14:57,451
Хелен, зайдите ко мне, пожалуйста.
237
00:15:02,861 --> 00:15:04,135
Спасибо, это все.
238
00:15:06,621 --> 00:15:08,452
Это было в последний раз.
Обещаю.
239
00:15:13,821 --> 00:15:15,539
Венди, мы же договорились.
240
00:15:15,781 --> 00:15:17,373
Да, ты обещала.
241
00:15:24,581 --> 00:15:25,775
Кто это был?
242
00:15:27,901 --> 00:15:29,095
Венди отказалась.
243
00:15:29,301 --> 00:15:30,939
У меня нет официантки.
244
00:15:32,621 --> 00:15:34,452
Как жаль.
245
00:15:34,941 --> 00:15:35,737
Пока-пока.
246
00:15:37,421 --> 00:15:38,934
- Десять долларов в час!
- Неа.
247
00:15:39,301 --> 00:15:40,370
12 в час.
248
00:15:40,821 --> 00:15:43,972
Я бы с радостью, но у меня запланирована прогулка.
249
00:15:45,301 --> 00:15:48,259
Когда ты сбежала с собственной свадьбы, я тебя
не бросила.
250
00:15:48,501 --> 00:15:52,210
Я дала тебе крышу над головой,
и если уж это ничего для тебя не значит...
251
00:15:52,981 --> 00:15:54,699
то 20$ в час.
252
00:15:56,021 --> 00:15:56,976
Идет.
253
00:16:03,621 --> 00:16:07,136
Здравствуйте! Добро пожаловать к Монике!
Можно ваше пальто?
254
00:16:10,501 --> 00:16:12,412
- Привет, Стив.
- Привет, Моника.
255
00:16:12,621 --> 00:16:14,339
Привет, встречающая девушка.
256
00:16:15,301 --> 00:16:17,292
- Это Рэйчел.
- Ага, ладно.
257
00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:21,737
Все пахнет так ароматно.
258
00:16:21,941 --> 00:16:26,059
Не могу припомнить, чтобы когда-нибудь ароматы
составляли такую замечательную комбинацию --
259
00:16:26,301 --> 00:16:27,495
Ну, ароматов.
260
00:16:28,981 --> 00:16:30,972
Милая квартирка.
261
00:16:31,221 --> 00:16:33,132
Спасибо. Может, хотите взглянуть?
262
00:16:33,381 --> 00:16:35,941
Я вообще-то из вежливости сказал, но давайте.
263
00:16:39,101 --> 00:16:40,056
В чем дело?
264
00:16:40,301 --> 00:16:44,260
В такси по дороге сюда Стив успел дунуть.
265
00:16:45,621 --> 00:16:46,417
Что?
266
00:16:47,101 --> 00:16:50,332
Покурил косячок, понимаешь?
Пыхнул. Травка, анаша, ганжа.
267
00:16:52,581 --> 00:16:54,572
Я поняла, поняла, Чич.
268
00:16:56,301 --> 00:16:58,292
Здесь такой сухой воздух. или мне кажется?
269
00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:03,537
Давайте, я налью вам вина.
270
00:17:03,821 --> 00:17:06,255
Думаю, мы готовы к нашему первому блюду.
271
00:17:09,181 --> 00:17:11,331
Это - равиоли со скальной креветкой...
272
00:17:11,581 --> 00:17:13,651
... в соусе понзу с коринадром...
273
00:17:13,901 --> 00:17:16,131
... с щепоткой мелкорубленного...
274
00:17:21,221 --> 00:17:22,336
... имбиря.
275
00:17:23,181 --> 00:17:25,456
Ух ты, вот это да!
276
00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:30,534
Они изумительны!
277
00:17:30,781 --> 00:17:33,215
Фух! Я так рада, что вам понравилось.
278
00:17:33,501 --> 00:17:35,617
Понравились? Да я бы их сотню съел!
279
00:17:38,821 --> 00:17:40,857
В общем, это все, что были..
280
00:17:41,101 --> 00:17:44,252
... но примерно через 8 с половиной минут
будут готовы тарталетки.
281
00:17:44,821 --> 00:17:46,140
"Тарталетки"?
282
00:17:46,621 --> 00:17:48,020
"Тарталетки".
283
00:17:49,021 --> 00:17:50,454
"Тарталетки".
284
00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:54,298
Какое-то бессмысленное слово.
285
00:18:00,421 --> 00:18:03,140
Простите. Я могу чем-нибудь помочь?
286
00:18:03,381 --> 00:18:05,736
Понимаете, я не совсем знаю, что ищу.
287
00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:23,014
Ух ты, здорово! Лепешки для тако!
288
00:18:25,701 --> 00:18:28,932
Это... Они ведь как маленькие маисовые конвертики!
289
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:31,575
Вы же не хотите перебить аппетит.
290
00:18:32,581 --> 00:18:33,809
Сахарные колечки!
291
00:18:34,101 --> 00:18:37,332
Знаете, если вы подождете еще
6 с половиной минут...
292
00:18:37,581 --> 00:18:39,617
Макароны и сыр!
Надо обязательно приготовить!
293
00:18:44,821 --> 00:18:46,300
Нет, не надо.
294
00:18:49,381 --> 00:18:50,416
Извини.
295
00:18:54,781 --> 00:18:56,931
Может, просто присядете здесь?
296
00:19:02,661 --> 00:19:03,696
Дайте мне мишек Гамми.
297
00:19:08,181 --> 00:19:09,057
Дайте их мне.
298
00:19:09,261 --> 00:19:10,171
Мы поделимся.
299
00:19:10,381 --> 00:19:12,611
- Нет. Дайте мне мишек.
- Не дам.
300
00:19:12,821 --> 00:19:13,731
Дайте их мне!
301
00:19:13,941 --> 00:19:15,135
Ничего не получается.
302
00:19:16,221 --> 00:19:18,894
Мишки за бортом! Они тонут!
303
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:23,057
Ребята! Хватайтесь за колечки!
Спасайтесь!
304
00:19:23,301 --> 00:19:26,737
На помощь! На помощь! Я тону! На помощь!
305
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,014
Так, хватит! Ужин закончен!
306
00:19:30,261 --> 00:19:31,137
- Что?
- "Что"?
307
00:19:31,381 --> 00:19:32,814
- Почему?
- "Почему"?
308
00:19:33,061 --> 00:19:35,211
Целых семь лет я ждала этого шанса...
309
00:19:35,421 --> 00:19:38,572
... а вы не можете подождать какие-то
4 с половиной минуты и попробовать тарталетку?
310
00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:50,090
Ну и придурок.
311
00:19:51,541 --> 00:19:53,736
Ты не хочешь работать на такого парня.
312
00:19:53,981 --> 00:19:57,974
Знаю. Просто я думала, что это было, понимаешь,
"то самое".
313
00:19:58,221 --> 00:19:59,939
Ты найдешь.
Ты прекрасный повар.
314
00:20:00,341 --> 00:20:02,775
И знаешь, эти аппетитные звуки?
Я не притворялась.
315
00:20:10,821 --> 00:20:12,971
И как все прошло с Селией?
316
00:20:14,341 --> 00:20:16,332
Я был невероятен!
317
00:20:16,541 --> 00:20:17,940
Молодец, Росс!
318
00:20:18,621 --> 00:20:21,340
Я был настоящим Львом Толстым похабной беседы!
319
00:20:21,581 --> 00:20:23,856
Это были такие продуманные непристойности,
каких ты в жизни не слышал.
320
00:20:24,101 --> 00:20:27,252
Там были действующие лица,
сюжетные линии...
321
00:20:27,741 --> 00:20:29,174
... темы, мотивы.
322
00:20:29,421 --> 00:20:32,015
На какой-то момент даже появились крестьяне.
323
00:20:33,781 --> 00:20:34,691
И...
324
00:20:36,501 --> 00:20:39,538
В общем, когда мы закончили похабные разговоры...
325
00:20:39,781 --> 00:20:42,215
... было уже поздно, и мы оба так устали, что...
326
00:20:42,461 --> 00:20:44,929
- Вы пообнимались.
- Ага, и это было приятно.
327
00:20:45,421 --> 00:20:47,935
Ребят, вы не хотите успеть на последний сеанс?
328
00:20:48,621 --> 00:20:50,179
А Чэндлера ждать не будем?
329
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:52,619
Опа! И где же это он запропастился?
330
00:20:53,101 --> 00:20:54,978
Да, Фрэн, я знаю который час...
331
00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:58,338
...но я смотрю на ЧЛЕН, и я не доволен!
332
00:20:59,421 --> 00:21:01,252
Да что ты?
Тогда я так скажу.
333
00:21:01,501 --> 00:21:05,938
Ты будешь думать о нем, потому что я думаю о нем.
Ясно? Хорошо!
334
00:21:21,141 --> 00:21:22,256
Как вам?
335
00:21:23,021 --> 00:21:25,216
Извините. А вот так?
336
00:21:25,421 --> 00:21:27,139
Значит, этот способ работает.
337
00:21:27,381 --> 00:21:29,337
Так больно?
338
00:21:29,781 --> 00:21:31,339
А так?
339
00:21:32,141 --> 00:21:33,494
Ну вот!
340
00:21:40,421 --> 00:21:41,410
О, господи!
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