Парные субтитры для TV фильмов и сериалов на английском и русском языках. Friends - Друзья. 2-22. The One with the Two Parties.

 
1
00:00:06,773 --> 00:00:09,298
I'll get candles and
my mom's lace tablecloth.

2
00:00:09,609 --> 00:00:11,668
And since it's Rachel's birthday...

3
00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:14,106
...I thought I'd poach a salmon.

4
00:00:14,981 --> 00:00:15,811
What?

5
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:20,110
Question. Why do we always
have parties where you poach things?

6
00:00:20,353 --> 00:00:21,820
You want to be on the food committee?

7
00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:25,147
Question 2. Why do we always
have parties with committees?

8
00:00:25,658 --> 00:00:29,458
Why can't we just get pizza
and beer and have fun?

9
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:33,723
I agree. Fancy parties are only fun
if you're fancy on the inside.

10
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,661
And I'm not sure we are.

11
00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:39,365
You don't want it to be special?

12
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:42,266
Fine. You can throw
any kind of party you want.

13
00:00:42,509 --> 00:00:44,340
Joey, they're not real!

14
00:00:46,413 --> 00:00:49,541
I start miles beneath the surface
of these things. They're fake.

15
00:00:49,849 --> 00:00:51,316
See?
Honk, honk!

16
00:00:52,852 --> 00:00:55,980
Wow, it's like porno for clowns!

17
00:00:57,957 --> 00:01:02,826
The One With Two Parties

18
00:01:44,804 --> 00:01:47,602
Neither of Rachel's sisters can come.

19
00:01:47,874 --> 00:01:51,275
I still have to invite Dylan
and Emma and Shannon Cooper.

20
00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:53,673
No Shannon Cooper.

21
00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:55,141
Why not her?

22
00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:56,346
Because she...

23
00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:58,244
She steals stuff.

24
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:05,690
Or maybe she doesn't and Joey slept
with her and never called her back.

25
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:09,252
Joey, that is horrible.

26
00:02:09,496 --> 00:02:10,690
Hey, I liked her.

27
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,261
Maybe too much.

28
00:02:12,532 --> 00:02:14,022
I don't know.

29
00:02:14,334 --> 00:02:16,529
I guess I just got scared.

30
00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:19,501
I'm sorry. I didn't know.

31
00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:23,236
I didn't think anyone
would buy that. Okay!

32
00:02:24,777 --> 00:02:26,176
Hi, honey.
How did it go?

33
00:02:26,412 --> 00:02:28,312
It was the graduation from hell.

34
00:02:28,581 --> 00:02:31,778
My cousin went to hell
on a football scholarship.

35
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:35,016
It's supposed to be a joyous occasion.

36
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:38,347
My sister would graduate from college.
Nobody thought she would.

37
00:02:38,858 --> 00:02:42,817
It's a testament to what a girl
from Long Island will do for a Celica.

38
00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:44,794
What happened?

39
00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:46,157
My parents happened.

40
00:02:46,399 --> 00:02:49,368
All they had to do was sit
in the same stadium, smile...

41
00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:52,764
...and not talk about the divorce.
But no!

42
00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:55,564
They got into a fight
during the commencement address.

43
00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:59,834
Bishop Tutu actually
had to stop and shush them.

44
00:03:02,215 --> 00:03:03,512
You know the good news?

45
00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:06,378
I get to serve coffee
for the next eight hours.

46
00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:10,785
I guess we don't invite her parents.

47
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:13,390
- How about just her mom?
- Why her mom?

48
00:03:13,893 --> 00:03:15,758
Because I already invited her.

49
00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:18,330
Did you ask Stacy Roth?

50
00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:19,826
Can't invite her.

51
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:24,099
She also steals.

52
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:30,109
So does her roomate.

53
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:40,383
Here are the candles.
Where's the birthday cake?

54
00:03:40,653 --> 00:03:42,518
We're not having birthday cake.

55
00:03:42,822 --> 00:03:44,517
We're having birthday flan.

56
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:47,825
Excuse me?

57
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,961
It's a traditional
Mexican custard dessert.

58
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,561
That's nice.

59
00:03:51,831 --> 00:03:54,527
Happy birthday, Rachel.
Here's some goo!

60
00:04:01,374 --> 00:04:02,705
Dr. Greene!

61
00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:05,006
Oh, my God!
It's Rachel's dad.

62
00:04:07,714 --> 00:04:08,942
Why are you here?

63
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,877
The father can't see
the daughter on her birthday?

64
00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:13,881
No, no, the father can.

65
00:04:14,187 --> 00:04:17,884
But since I am the roommate,
I can tell you she's not here.

66
00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:21,183
And I'll pass along the message.
Okay? So bye-bye.

67
00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:23,323
You're having a party.

68
00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:26,265
No, no, not a party.

69
00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:29,626
Just a surprise gathering
of some people Rachel knows.

70
00:04:29,902 --> 00:04:33,565
- This is Phoebe, Chandler and Joey.
- I'll never remember all that.

71
00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:36,131
So what's the deal?

72
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:40,037
Rachel comes home, people pop out
and yell stuff? Is that it?

73
00:04:40,313 --> 00:04:43,714
This isn't your first
surprise party, is it, sir?

74
00:04:46,653 --> 00:04:48,120
Hi, Monica.

75
00:04:51,257 --> 00:04:54,124
The Chinese menu guy.
Forgot the menus.

76
00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:57,055
So basically, just a Chinese guy.

77
00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:02,962
Dr. Greene, come with me.
We'll put your jacket on Rachel's bed.

78
00:05:05,705 --> 00:05:08,606
All right.
That sounds like a two-person job.

79
00:05:12,178 --> 00:05:14,442
Well, my goodness!
What was that?

80
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:18,275
Sandra, I thought you were Rachel.
We weren't ready for you yet.

81
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:22,249
- You thought I was Rachel?
- Yes, because you look so young.

82
00:05:22,522 --> 00:05:25,047
And because you're both,
you know, white women.

83
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:31,957
Oh, I missed you kids.
Should I put my coat in the bedroom?

84
00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:37,594
- No, I'll take that for you.
- Oh, well, thank you.

85
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:40,100
Such a gentleman.
Thank you.

86
00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:46,975
It all looks so nice.
So festive. All the balloons.

87
00:05:48,081 --> 00:05:51,482
Oh, the funniest thing happened
to me on the way here.

88
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:54,252
- I was driving
- That's great!

89
00:05:57,523 --> 00:06:00,822
I can't wait to hear the rest,
but I have to go to the bathroom.

90
00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:02,754
Hey, come with me.

91
00:06:03,296 --> 00:06:05,491
- What?
- It will be like we're gal pals.

92
00:06:05,798 --> 00:06:08,528
You know, like at a restaurant.
It'll be fun! Come on.

93
00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:16,337
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!

94
00:06:16,609 --> 00:06:18,076
Think. Think.

95
00:06:18,344 --> 00:06:20,505
What would Jack and Chrissy do?

96
00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:25,815
Okay, now that your coat
is safely in the bed

97
00:06:26,085 --> 00:06:28,383
We can come back out
in the living room.

98
00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:32,954
Joey and Chandler, it's time
you take Dr. Greene over to your place.

99
00:06:33,192 --> 00:06:35,023
Yes, absolutely.

100
00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:37,292
Why, again?

101
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:41,199
Because that's where
the party is, you goon!

102
00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:46,769
- See, this is just the staging area.
- Right, it's the staging area.

103
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:50,008
This is clearly
in the wrong apartment.

104
00:06:55,214 --> 00:06:58,706
All right, you guys are off
to party number one.

105
00:07:00,186 --> 00:07:01,813
And you...

106
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,488
You are off to party number two.

107
00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:08,218
All right, let's keep it moving,
let's keep it moving.

108
00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,997
At least send some women to my party.

109
00:07:15,334 --> 00:07:17,268
Okay, that's Ross. All right.

110
00:07:18,337 --> 00:07:19,770
Okay, they're coming.

111
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:29,277
Thank you for such a wonderful dinner.

112
00:07:29,916 --> 00:07:31,679
Thanks for being born.

113
00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:34,977
Thank you for my beautiful earrings.
They're perfect.

114
00:07:35,221 --> 00:07:36,347
I love you.

115
00:07:37,223 --> 00:07:40,283
Now, you can exchange them
if you want, okay?

116
00:07:41,060 --> 00:07:43,085
Now I love you even more.

117
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:49,566
Surprise!

118
00:07:50,436 --> 00:07:51,903
Oh, my gosh!

119
00:07:52,171 --> 00:07:53,001
Wow!

120
00:07:54,273 --> 00:07:55,900
Oh, my God. Mom!

121
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,404
This is so great!

122
00:07:57,844 --> 00:07:59,812
Happy birthday, sweetie.

123
00:08:01,447 --> 00:08:04,007
You! I had no idea!

124
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:05,410
- Really?
- No, I knew.

125
00:08:05,685 --> 00:08:06,811
All right.

126
00:08:07,954 --> 00:08:10,218
There's food and drinks on the table.

127
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:13,083
Go across the hall.
Right now, Joey and Chandler's.

128
00:08:13,359 --> 00:08:14,587
- Why?
- Just go.

129
00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:18,228
Weird.

130
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,430
Surprise!

131
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:25,262
Happy birthday, sweet pea.

132
00:08:25,538 --> 00:08:26,596
Daddy!

133
00:08:34,614 --> 00:08:37,515
Both of them are here? Both of them?
Both of them are here?

134
00:08:37,817 --> 00:08:40,115
Well, we could count again?

135
00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:42,184
I can't believe this!

136
00:08:42,421 --> 00:08:43,911
You know, this is ridiculous.

137
00:08:44,223 --> 00:08:46,453
This is your birthday, your party.

138
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:49,855
Let's put them together.
If they can't deal with it, who cares?

139
00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:52,087
- I do.
- That's who.

140
00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:55,397
Are you gonna be okay?

141
00:08:55,635 --> 00:08:59,435
I don't really have a choice.
I can look at the bright side.

142
00:08:59,705 --> 00:09:02,538
I get two birthday parties
and two birthday cakes.

143
00:09:02,808 --> 00:09:04,002
Well, actually...

144
00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:06,669
...just one birthday flan.

145
00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:12,544
It's a traditional
Mexican custard dessert.

146
00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:15,343
Talk to Monica.
She's on the food committee.

147
00:09:22,261 --> 00:09:25,719
Some girl just walked up to me
and said, "I want you, Dennis"...

148
00:09:26,032 --> 00:09:28,432
...and stuck her tongue
down my throat.

149
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,095
I love this party!

150
00:09:31,337 --> 00:09:33,362
- Quick volleyball question.
- Volleyball.

151
00:09:33,673 --> 00:09:35,607
We set up a court in your room.

152
00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:38,275
You didn't like
that gray lamp, did you?

153
00:09:39,445 --> 00:09:43,609
A woman stuck her tongue down my
throat. I'm not even listening to you.

154
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,745
- Dennis!
- Okay, that's me.

155
00:09:48,220 --> 00:09:52,122
Can you keep Dad occupied?
I'm gonna talk to Mom for a while.

156
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,859
Do you have any ideas
for any openers?

157
00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:58,753
Stay clear of "I'm the guy
that's doing your daughter"...

158
00:09:59,098 --> 00:10:01,066
...and you should be okay.

159
00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,270
I want you to take a piece of paper

160
00:10:05,538 --> 00:10:09,440
Here you go. And write down
your most embarrassing memory.

161
00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:14,446
When you're not using the markers,
put the caps back on them...

162
00:10:14,714 --> 00:10:16,705
...because they will dry out.

163
00:10:17,683 --> 00:10:19,048
Hi, Dr. Greene.

164
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:23,118
So how's everything in the...

165
00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:25,790
...vascular surgery...

166
00:10:26,325 --> 00:10:27,121
...game?

167
00:10:28,494 --> 00:10:31,895
It's not a game, Ross.
A woman died on my table today.

168
00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:33,759
I'm sorry.

169
00:10:35,868 --> 00:10:38,029
That's the good thing about my job.

170
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:41,535
All the dinosaurs on my table
are already dead.

171
00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:46,804
Listen, I don't mean
to be a pain about this...

172
00:10:47,046 --> 00:10:50,140
...but I've noticed some of you
are just placing them on.

173
00:10:50,349 --> 00:10:52,180
You want to push the caps...

174
00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:56,144
...until you hear them click.

175
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:58,786
Gunther!

176
00:10:59,025 --> 00:10:59,957
Where you going?

177
00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:02,820
I was sort of thinking about maybe

178
00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:06,064
No! No, you can't go!
No, this is fun.

179
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:08,867
We're just starting.
Here's your marker.

180
00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:14,867
If you want to go, just go.

181
00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:17,039
She'll yell at me again.

182
00:11:20,446 --> 00:11:22,243
All right, I can get you out.

183
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:23,504
What?

184
00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:27,685
In a minute, I'll create a diversion.

185
00:11:27,987 --> 00:11:31,616
When I do, walk quickly to the door
and don't look back.

186
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,627
- I think I need a drink.
- I'll get it for you.

187
00:11:35,895 --> 00:11:37,829
- What do you want?
- Scotch.

188
00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:42,431
I'll be back in 10 seconds with
your scotch on the rocks in a glass.

189
00:11:42,768 --> 00:11:43,564
Neat!

190
00:11:44,270 --> 00:11:45,202
Cool.

191
00:11:46,305 --> 00:11:49,103
Neat, as in no rocks.

192
00:11:50,009 --> 00:11:50,873
I know.

193
00:11:54,914 --> 00:11:58,247
Hello, Ross!
Where have you been?

194
00:11:58,984 --> 00:12:01,817
I have been in the bathroom.

195
00:12:02,888 --> 00:12:05,322
Stay clear of the salmon mousse.

196
00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:11,489
Scotch neat.

197
00:12:11,964 --> 00:12:13,989
That's Rachel's father's drink.

198
00:12:16,102 --> 00:12:18,502
Mine too. Isn't that neat?

199
00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:21,032
Scotch neat.

200
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,768
Would you excuse me?

201
00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:34,512
Where are you sneaking off to, mister?

202
00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:37,146
I'm getting my cigarettes.

203
00:12:37,389 --> 00:12:38,287
No.

204
00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:39,855
What do you mean "no"?

205
00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:42,789
See, because that's the staging area.

206
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:46,587
You go in there, it'll ruin
the whole illusion of the party.

207
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,791
Take your scotch back in there...

208
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:53,368
...and I will get
your cigarettes for you, sir.

209
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:56,799
- Get my glasses too.
- All righty-roo.

210
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:03,540
What a great moment to say that
for the first time.

211
00:13:06,852 --> 00:13:11,186
Okay, the first person's
most embarrassing memory is...

212
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:13,448
..."Monica, your party sucks."

213
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:15,889
Very funny.

214
00:13:16,595 --> 00:13:19,860
Oh, no! Did someone forget
to use a coaster?

215
00:13:20,099 --> 00:13:21,259
What?

216
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:29,907
I don't see anything.

217
00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:33,370
Great, I'm seeing water rings again.

218
00:13:36,415 --> 00:13:38,747
Ross, whose glasses are those?

219
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:40,707
Mine.

220
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,022
You wear bifocals?

221
00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:49,150
I have a condition apparently...

222
00:13:49,428 --> 00:13:51,259
...that I require...

223
00:13:52,765 --> 00:13:55,063
...two different sets of focals.

224
00:13:56,135 --> 00:13:59,502
Do you know my husband
has glasses just like that?

225
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:02,400
Well, those are very popular frames.

226
00:14:02,708 --> 00:14:04,733
Neil Sedaka wears them.

227
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:10,214
I hear you can get people out of here.

228
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:17,483
You didn't tell me
your boyfriend smokes.

229
00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:19,121
Yeah, like a chimney.

230
00:14:20,926 --> 00:14:22,052
Big smoker.

231
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,425
Big, big smoker.

232
00:14:25,764 --> 00:14:29,666
In fact, I'm gonna go into the hallway
and fire up this bad boy.

233
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:44,982
Are you wearing my glasses?

234
00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:47,484
Yes.

235
00:14:50,189 --> 00:14:54,023
I was just warming up
the earpieces for you.

236
00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:55,926
Thank you.

237
00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:00,498
Is that one of my cigarettes?

238
00:15:07,106 --> 00:15:10,974
Yes, it is. I was just
moistening the tip.

239
00:15:12,945 --> 00:15:16,312
She's taking the trash out,
so I can get you out of here.

240
00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:18,879
But it has to be now.
She'll be back any minute.

241
00:15:19,184 --> 00:15:20,048
What about my friend?

242
00:15:20,319 --> 00:15:23,777
Only the three of you.
Any more and she'll get suspicious.

243
00:15:24,056 --> 00:15:26,581
- Let me just get my coat.
- There isn't time!

244
00:15:29,094 --> 00:15:30,527
Just leave everything.

245
00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,294
They'll take care of you next door.

246
00:15:33,899 --> 00:15:35,730
Is it true they have beer?

247
00:15:37,036 --> 00:15:39,334
Everything you've heard is true.

248
00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:42,571
Could you guys please keep it down?

249
00:15:42,808 --> 00:15:45,572
We're trying to start
a Boggle tournament.

250
00:15:45,644 --> 00:15:50,547
True, if these people find out a funny game,
then will be no people left in our party.

251
00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:57,184
You!

252
00:15:57,489 --> 00:15:58,513
And you.

253
00:15:58,824 --> 00:16:00,689
You're supposed to be at my party.

254
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:02,756
And Gunther!

255
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:09,025
What are you doing here?

256
00:16:13,005 --> 00:16:14,632
Welcome to the fo

257
00:16:18,844 --> 00:16:21,745
All right, I'm sorry.
But these people needed me.

258
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,211
They work hard all week.
It's Saturday night.

259
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:26,611
They deserve to have a little fun.
Go!

260
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,615
You know, my party is fun.

261
00:16:29,955 --> 00:16:32,515
It's a little quieter,
less obvious sort of fun.

262
00:16:32,791 --> 00:16:35,851
But if people would just
give it a chance, it's

263
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:44,727
- You want me to see a therapist?
- Sweetheart, you have a problem.

264
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,599
You've chosen a boyfriend
exactly like your father.

265
00:16:49,541 --> 00:16:51,805
Okay, Mom, I'll make an appointment.

266
00:16:52,144 --> 00:16:55,272
But right now, I gotta go.
I gotta go do a thing.

267
00:16:55,547 --> 00:17:00,348
Did you know your mother
spent $1200 on bonsai trees?

268
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:02,447
I felt like Gulliver.

269
00:17:03,555 --> 00:17:06,319
Daddy, I really want
to hear more about this...

270
00:17:06,658 --> 00:17:09,752
...but I just have to do some stuff.

271
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,964
You work and you work
and you work at a marriage...

272
00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:15,598
...but all he cares about
is his stupid boat.

273
00:17:15,934 --> 00:17:18,630
You work and you work
and you work on a boat.

274
00:17:18,937 --> 00:17:21,804
He always ridiculed my pottery classes.

275
00:17:22,074 --> 00:17:23,974
And you sand it and varnish it.

276
00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:27,804
But when all is said and done,
he still drinks out of the mugs.

277
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,981
One night of her yoga
and Bridges of Madison County...

278
00:17:31,316 --> 00:17:34,012
- The scotch, the cigarettes...
- The bonsais and the Chihuahua...

279
00:17:34,319 --> 00:17:36,514
I may have only been in therapy
for three weeks now but

280
00:17:36,855 --> 00:17:39,289
What the hell does she want
with half a boat?

281
00:17:43,195 --> 00:17:46,653
Okay, okay, you can be shirts
and I'll be skins.

282
00:17:47,699 --> 00:17:49,496
I'll be skins!

283
00:17:56,308 --> 00:17:58,503
How you holding up there, big tiger?

284
00:18:00,279 --> 00:18:04,045
Sorry. When my parents were getting
divorced, I got a lot of "tigers."

285
00:18:04,950 --> 00:18:08,351
I got a lot of "champs,"
"chiefs," "sports."

286
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:09,846
I even got a "governor."

287
00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:15,791
This is it, isn't it?
This is what my life will be like.

288
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:18,219
My mom there, my dad there.

289
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:21,065
Thanksgiving, Christmas.

290
00:18:21,333 --> 00:18:25,861
She gets the house, he's in a condo
my sister will decorate with wicker.

291
00:18:26,738 --> 00:18:28,899
How did you get through this?

292
00:18:31,143 --> 00:18:34,044
I relied on a carefully
regimented program...

293
00:18:34,313 --> 00:18:35,780
...of denial...

294
00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:38,545
...and wetting the bed.

295
00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,717
You know, I just
It's so weird.

296
00:18:44,056 --> 00:18:48,652
I mean, I was in there just listening
to them bitch about each other.

297
00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:51,657
All I kept thinking about
was the Fourth of July.

298
00:18:53,332 --> 00:18:55,266
Because it reminded you of the way...

299
00:18:55,501 --> 00:18:58,129
...our forefathers used
to bitch at each other?

300
00:18:59,104 --> 00:19:01,698
It's just this thing.
Every year we would...

301
00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:04,703
...go out on my dad's boat
and watch the fireworks.

302
00:19:05,310 --> 00:19:09,269
Mom always hated it because
the ocean air made her hair all big.

303
00:19:09,548 --> 00:19:12,608
My sister Jill would be
throwing up over the side...

304
00:19:13,018 --> 00:19:15,612
...and Dad would be upset
because nobody helping.

305
00:19:15,954 --> 00:19:19,014
And when we did help, he'd scream
at us for doing it wrong.

306
00:19:22,294 --> 00:19:26,424
But then when the fireworks started,
everybody just shut up.

307
00:19:27,032 --> 00:19:29,262
You know, and it'd get really cold.

308
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:33,129
And we'd all just sort of
smoosh under this one blanket.

309
00:19:33,472 --> 00:19:36,498
It never occurred to anybody
to bring another one.

310
00:19:38,310 --> 00:19:39,709
And now it's...

311
00:19:43,482 --> 00:19:44,779
Yeah, I know.

312
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,141
Thanks for coming.
I hope you had fun.

313
00:20:10,609 --> 00:20:12,543
All right, I'm hitting the road.

314
00:20:12,844 --> 00:20:15,711
Now, I've left my 10 verbs
on the table.

315
00:20:15,948 --> 00:20:18,143
Be sure and send me
that finished poem.

316
00:20:18,483 --> 00:20:20,280
Okay, will do. Glad you came.

317
00:20:20,652 --> 00:20:23,644
- I think I saw Rachel out in the hall.
- Let me go check.

318
00:20:26,425 --> 00:20:28,325
Your mom wants to say goodbye.

319
00:20:28,660 --> 00:20:30,560
Happy birthday, sweetie.

320
00:20:33,832 --> 00:20:34,799
You drive safe.

321
00:20:36,702 --> 00:20:37,999
What are you doing?

322
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:42,737
I'm getting ready
for the water skiing.

323
00:20:43,041 --> 00:20:45,236
Okay, big hug. One more.
Come on!

324
00:20:48,313 --> 00:20:49,371
How are you?

325
00:20:51,850 --> 00:20:53,750
- Where are you going?
- To get my coat.

326
00:20:54,052 --> 00:20:55,383
We'll get that for you.

327
00:20:55,721 --> 00:20:58,656
All right, all right.
I can get my own coat.

328
00:21:06,465 --> 00:21:09,025
Sorry, we're on a major flan high.

329
00:21:11,803 --> 00:21:14,499
Oh, no. No, you're not
supposed to be here.

330
00:21:14,806 --> 00:21:18,071
This is the staging area.
It's all wrong. You should leave.

331
00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:21,108
You know, just get out.

332
00:21:30,055 --> 00:21:32,250
Or perhaps you'd like
a creme de menthe.

333
00:21:33,892 --> 00:21:35,917
I have to be heading
toward my chateau.

334
00:21:36,261 --> 00:21:38,991
I guess we're going back
into the hallway again.

335
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:41,266
Thanks for coming, Mrs. Greene.

336
00:21:54,112 --> 00:21:55,545
You take care.

337
00:21:59,117 --> 00:22:00,675
Oh, you kids.

338
00:22:03,622 --> 00:22:04,418
Well.

339
00:22:06,191 --> 00:22:09,251
This is the best party
I've been to in years.

340
00:22:10,295 --> 00:22:11,387
Thank you!

341
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:19,429
Okay, everybody,
it's time for flan!

342
00:22:19,738 --> 00:22:23,003
Yep! Get ready
for the gelatinous fun.

343
00:22:24,076 --> 00:22:27,375
Looks like that stuff you get
when you get an infection.

344
00:22:27,679 --> 00:22:29,374
Okay, that's enough.

345
00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:32,343
Okay, Rachel,
make a special flan wish.

346
00:22:33,719 --> 00:22:35,243
Okay, I've got one.

347
00:22:39,624 --> 00:22:40,682
Heads up!

348
00:22:42,761 --> 00:22:45,753
Wow! Those things almost
never come true.

1
00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:10,200
Я принесу свечи и кружевную
скатерть моей мамы.

2
00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:12,480
И раз уж это день рождения
Рейчел...

3
00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:15,400
...что я где-нибудь надыбаю лосося.

4
00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:16,440
Что?

5
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:20,600
Вопрос. Почему у нас всегда
праздники, для которых что-то надо дыбать?

6
00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:22,280
Хочешь в продовольственный
комитет?

7
00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:25,680
Вопрос нр.2. Зачем нам на праздники
комитеты?

8
00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:29,560
Почему мы не можем просто взять
пиццу с пивом и повеселиться?

9
00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:33,680
Я согласна. Красивые праздники веселы,
если всё красиво снутри.

10
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:36,680
А я не уверена, что мы такие.

11
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:39,080
Хорошо. Раз уж
вы не хотите ничего особенного...

12
00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:41,800
Прекрасно. Можете делать праздник
такой, какой хотите.

13
00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:45,320
Джоуи! Они не настоящие!

14
00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:48,880
Я начинаюсь через несколько миль от
их поверхности. Это фальшь.

15
00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:51,760
Видишь?
Бип-бип!

16
00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:56,520
Ух ты! Это прямо как клоунское порно!

17
00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:00,160
Сезон 2, серия 22
Та, с двумя праздниками.

18
00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:03,680
Русские субтитры:
Dais 2009

19
00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:46,640
Я узнал, что ни одна из сестёр
Рейчел не сможет приехать.

20
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:51,040
Мне ещё нужно пригласить Дилана
и Эмму и Шенон Купер.

21
00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:52,440
Не надо Шенон Купер.

22
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:53,880
Почему не её?

23
00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:55,000
Потому что она...

24
00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:58,360
Она крадёт вещи.

25
00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:05,520
Или может не крадёт, но Джоуи переспал
с ней, и больше не звонит ей.

26
00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:07,400
Джоуи, это ужасно.

27
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:08,800
Эй, она мне нравилась.

28
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:10,280
Может даже слишком.

29
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,000
Не знаю.

30
00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:15,200
Боюсь, я просто испугался.

31
00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:17,960
Извини. Я не знала.

32
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:22,000
Я и не думал, что все
на это купятся.

33
00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:23,600
Привет, золотце.
Как всё прошло?

34
00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:25,680
Это был выпускной из ада.

35
00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:29,720
А моя кузина ходила в ад
с целым футбольным клубом.

36
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:32,160
Ожидалось, что это будет
радостное событие.

37
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,560
Никто не ожидал от моей сестры,
что она закончит колледж.

38
00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:40,440
Это пример того, что может сделать
девушка из Лонг Айленда за Селику.
(Форд Селика - машина)

39
00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:41,480
Что случилось?

40
00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:42,800
Мои родители случились.

41
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:45,880
Всё, что от них требовалось -
это сидеть на стадионе, гордо улыбаться...

42
00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:49,080
...и молчать о разводе.
Но нет!

43
00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,840
Они здорово поссорились во время
прощального напутствия.

44
00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:57,400
Епископу Туту пришлось всё остановить
и утихомирить их.

45
00:02:58,120 --> 00:02:59,440
А знаете, что мне нравится?

46
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:03,720
То, что я буду подавать кофе последующие
восемь часов.

47
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,400
Я думаю, нам не следует
приглашать её родителей.

48
00:03:06,640 --> 00:03:09,160
- Как насчёт только мамы?
- Почему мамы?

49
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:11,560
Потому, что я её уже пригласила.

50
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:13,680
А ты приглашала Стейси Рот?

51
00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:16,600
Нельзя её приглашать.

52
00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:20,640
Она тоже крадёт.

53
00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,480
Так, вот свечки.
Где же торт?

54
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:30,560
У нас не будет торта.

55
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:33,960
У нас будет пирог.

56
00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:35,600
Извините.

57
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,680
Это традициональный мексиканский
творожный дессерт.

58
00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,200
Прекрасно.

59
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:43,520
С Днём рождения Рейчел.
На те творожку!

60
00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,080
Др. Грин!

61
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,560
Боже мой!
Это отец Рейчел.

62
00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:55,880
Почему вы здесь?

63
00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:58,680
Разве отец не может заскочить
к дочери в её День рождения?

64
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:00,640
Нет, нет, отец может.

65
00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:04,480
Но я, как соседка, могу
вам сообщить, что её тут нет.

66
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:07,760
А я ей передам, что вы заходили.
Ладно? Тогда пока-пока.

67
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,360
Эй! Да у вас тут будет праздник.

68
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:12,480
Нет, нет, не праздник.

69
00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:15,680
Просто небольшой сюрприз
от людей, знающих Рейчел.

70
00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:20,360
- Это Фиби, Чендлер и Джоуи.
- Я никогда этого всего не запомню.

71
00:04:20,700 --> 00:04:21,960
Ну, так в чём дело?

72
00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:25,680
Рейчел зайдёт домой, все вскочат,
начнут орать? Так, да?

73
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:30,720
Я понимаю, что это уже не первый
праздничный сюрприз для вас, сер?

74
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,920
Привет, Моника.

75
00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:39,200
Парень с китайского ресторана.
Забыл забрать меню.

76
00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:43,520
Так, в основном, просто китаец.

77
00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:49,160
Эй! Др. Грин, пойдёмте со мной.
Мы положим вашу куртку у Рейчел.

78
00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:54,560
Хорошо.
Похоже, это работа для двоих.

79
00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,680
Ну, вот дела!
Что это было?

80
00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:02,360
Сандра, я думала, что вы - Рейчел.
А мы ещё не были готовы.

81
00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:06,160
- Ты спутала меня с Рейчел?
- Да,.. ведь... вы выглядите так молодо.

82
00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:10,360
И к тому же вы обе...
...ну знаете, - белые женщины.

83
00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:17,040
О, я скучала по вам, дети.
Наверное, мне надо кинуть пальто в спальню?

84
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:20,880
- Нет! Я это сделаю для вас.
- О, ну, чтож, спасибо.

85
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,760
Какой джентльмен.
Спасибо.

86
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:30,680
Всё это выглядит так здорово.
Так празднично. Все эти шарики.

87
00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:34,240
О, а вот, самое весёлое,
что случилось по дороге сюда.

88
00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:38,360
- Я ехала...
- Ха-ха! Это прекрасно!

89
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:43,160
Не могу дождаться услышать что
было дальше, но мне надо в туалет.

90
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,240
Эй! Пойдём со мной!

91
00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:47,680
- Что?
- Вроде, как мы девчонки - подружки.

92
00:05:47,920 --> 00:05:52,040
Знаете, как в ресторане.
Будет весело! Пошли!

93
00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:58,040
О, боже. О, боже.
О, боже!

94
00:05:58,280 --> 00:05:59,680
Думай. Думай!

95
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,520
Что бы делали Джек и Крисси?

96
00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:07,160
Ну вот, ваше пальто уже
аккуратно лежит на кроватке...

97
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,640
Теперь мы можем снова
пройти в гостиную.

98
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:13,960
Джоуи и Чендлер, время вести
Др. Грина в вашу квартиру.

99
00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:17,080
Да, конечно.

100
00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:19,280
Только, почему?

101
00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:23,360
Потому, что там-то и будет
праздник, ты - дурашка!

102
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:27,200
- Понимаете, это место подготовки.
- Точно, это место подготовки.

103
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:31,800
Это повесили совсем не в той
квартире.

104
00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:39,840
Хорошо, вы, ребята,
назначены на праздник нр.1.

105
00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:41,680
А вы...

106
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:44,600
Вы на праздник нр.2.

107
00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:49,320
Так, ребята, двигаемся,
двигаемся.

108
00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:53,880
Чендлер, пришли хотя бы несколько
женщин на мой праздник.

109
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:57,200
Так, это Росс. Хорошо.

110
00:06:57,440 --> 00:07:00,360
Так, они идут.

111
00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:08,280
Спасибо тебе за такой замечательный
ужин.

112
00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,280
Спасибо, что ты родилась.

113
00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:13,440
Спасибо за прекрасные серёжки.
Они идеальны.

114
00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,360
Люблю тебя.

115
00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:19,000
Можешь обменять их,
если захочешь.

116
00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:22,720
Теперь я люблю тебя ещё больше.

117
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:27,960
Сюрприз!

118
00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:29,680
О, блин!

119
00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:31,680
Ух ты!
Моника.

120
00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:33,480
О, боже мой, мам!

121
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,080
Как хорошо!

122
00:07:35,320 --> 00:07:38,720
С Днём рожденья, дорогая.

123
00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:41,320
Ты!.. Я даже не представляла!..

124
00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:43,380
- Правда?
- Да знала, конечно.

125
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:44,440
Хорошо.

126
00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:47,280
Там на столе еда и напитки.

127
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:50,040
Идите через коридор.
Сейчас же к Джоуи и Чендлеру.

128
00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,920
- Зачем?
- Просто идите.

129
00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:54,960
Странно.

130
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:57,640
Сюрприз!

131
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:01,680
С Днём рожденья, дорогуша.

132
00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:04,440
Папа!

133
00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:11,680
Они оба тут? Оба?
Они оба тут?

134
00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,640
Ну, я могу их снова пересчитать.

135
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:16,080
Я не могу поверить!

136
00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:17,800
Знаешь, это смешно.

137
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,200
Это твой День рожденья.

138
00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,480
Давайте их объединим.
Если они так не смогут, кого это колышет?

139
00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:27,160
- Меня.
- Вот кого.

140
00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:28,760
С тобой всё будет хорошо?

141
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,640
У меня нет большого выбора.
Хотя, это даже не плохо.

142
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,640
У меня же два Дня рождения,
и два торта.

143
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:37,360
Ну, вобще-то...

144
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:41,120
...один из них пирог.

145
00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:45,280
Традициональный мексиканский
творожный дессерт.

146
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:49,480
Спроси у Моники.
Она же из продовольственного комитета...

147
00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:57,920
Джо! Одна девушка подошла ко мне
и сказала: Я хочу тебя, Деннис ...

148
00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,640
...и засунула язык мне в глотку.

149
00:09:00,880 --> 00:09:03,000
Люблю этот праздник!

150
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:05,200
- Быстрый волейбольный вопрос.
- Волейбол.

151
00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:07,280
Мы играли в твоей комнате.

152
00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:10,760
Тебе же не нравилась та серая лампа?

153
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,160
Джо...
Женщина сунула язык мне в глотку.

154
00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:15,240
Я тебя даже не слушаю.

155
00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:19,200
- Деннис!
- Так, это меня.

156
00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:23,200
Можешь пока заняться папой?
Я хочу поговорить с мамой немного.

157
00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:26,440
Как думаешь, с чего мне
начать разговор?

158
00:09:26,680 --> 00:09:29,640
Держись подальше от темы
" Я имею вашу дочь"...

159
00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:33,280
...и тогда всё будет хорошо.

160
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:35,800
Я хочу, чтобы вы взяли лист бумаги...

161
00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:40,080
Вот тебе. И написали бы самое
неловкое воспоминание.

162
00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:44,600
А когда напишете, оденьте
обратно на маркеры колпачки...

163
00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,480
...иначе они высохнут.

164
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:50,520
Привет, др. Грин.

165
00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:53,400
Так как там в...

166
00:09:53,640 --> 00:09:55,760
...восковой хирургии...

167
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,840
...играется?

168
00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,720
Это не игра, Росс.
На моём столе сегодня умерла женщина.

169
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,640
Сожалею.

170
00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:07,200
Вот в чём прелесть моей работы.

171
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:12,080
Все динозавры на моём столе
уже давно мертвы.

172
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,600
Слушайте, я не хочу
вам надоедать этим...

173
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:18,800
...но я заметила, что некоторые
их просто одевают.

174
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:22,320
Вам следует нажать на колпачок...

175
00:10:22,680 --> 00:10:26,160
...пока не услышите щелчок.

176
00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:27,240
Гантер!

177
00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:28,240
Куда ты собрался?

178
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,000
Я тут подумал, может мне...

179
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:34,160
Нет! Нет нельзя выходить!
Нет, это же весело!

180
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:38,280
Мы только начинаем.
На, вот тебе маркер.

181
00:10:39,920 --> 00:10:42,560
Если хочешь уйти, то иди.

182
00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:46,120
Нет.
Она будет опять на меня орать.

183
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:49,600
Хорошо, я могу тебя вывести.

184
00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:52,360
Что?

185
00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:54,880
Через минуту я отвлеку внимание.

186
00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:59,400
И тогда, быстро выходи в дверь
и не оглядывайся.

187
00:10:59,640 --> 00:11:02,480
- Я думаю, мне надо выпить.
- Я! Я принесу вам выпить.

188
00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:04,600
- Что вы хотите?
- Скотч.

189
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:09,040
Я вернусь через 10 секунд с вашим
скотчем на скалах в стакане.

190
00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:10,480
Нит!

191
00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,480
Хорошо.

192
00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:16,040
Нит и чтобы без скал.

193
00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:18,640
Я понял.

194
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:24,680
Привет, Росс!
Где ты пропадал?

195
00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:28,440
Я ходил в туалет.

196
00:11:28,680 --> 00:11:32,560
Не подходите к лососевому муссу.

197
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,080
Скотч нит.

198
00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:40,880
Это напиток отца Рейчел.

199
00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:44,160
И мой тоже. Какое совпадение?

200
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:47,520
Скотч нит.

201
00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:52,120
Вы извините меня?

202
00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:59,760
Куда это вы крадётесь, мистер?

203
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,520
Иду за сигаретами.

204
00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:02,600
Нет.

205
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:04,560
Что значит нет?

206
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:06,960
Видите ли, из-за того, что это место
подготовки.

207
00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:11,480
Если вы туда зайдёте, то это разрушит
всё представление о празднике.

208
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:13,640
Берите скотч и обратно туда...

209
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:17,160
...а я принесу вам сигареты, сер.

210
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:21,880
- Захвати очки тоже.
- Всенепременно.

211
00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:28,320
Какой удачный момент, чтобы
сказать это в первый раз.

212
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:34,160
Итак, первые неловкие
воспоминания у...

213
00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:37,200
..."Моника, твой праздник плох".

214
00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:39,080
Очень смешно.

215
00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:42,480
О, нет! Кто-то забыл, как
пользоваться салфеткой?

216
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:45,320
Что?

217
00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:52,680
Я ничего не вижу.

218
00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:56,880
Класс, а я снова вижу круги на воде.

219
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:01,280
Росс, чьи это очки?

220
00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:04,000
Мои.

221
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,200
Ты носишь бифокальные?

222
00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:10,600
Мне иногда, определённо...

223
00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:13,800
...это то, что нужно...

224
00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:17,000
...два разных фокуса.

225
00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:20,480
Ты знаешь, что у моего мужа
точно такие же очки?

226
00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:23,280
Ну, это же очень популярная оправа.

227
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:27,040
Нил Седака такую носит.

228
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:32,280
Я слышал, что ты вытаскиваешь
людей отсюда.

229
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:37,760
Рейчел, ты не говорила, что твой
парень курит.

230
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,800
Да, как паровоз.

231
00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:43,640
Большой любитель.

232
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:45,440
Большой, большой куряка.

233
00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:50,920
Вот, пойду в подъезд подпалю
этого плохиша.

234
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:05,400
Ты одел мои очки?

235
00:14:05,640 --> 00:14:08,040
Да.

236
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:13,480
Просто подогрел дужки
для вас.

237
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:16,120
Спасибо.

238
00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:20,520
А это одна из моих сигарет?

239
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:30,520
Да, это так. Просто увлажнил
фильтр.

240
00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:34,160
Она собирает мусор, значит
я могу вас вывести отсюда.

241
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,680
Но тогда действуем прямо сейчас.
Она вернётся в любую минуту.

242
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:37,760
А как же мой друг Виктор?

243
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:41,360
Только вы трое.
Если больше, то она заподозрит что-то.

244
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:45,560
- Дайте, хоть пальто заберу.
- Нету времени!

245
00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:48,040
Оставляйте всё.

246
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:50,800
За второй дверью о вас позаботятся.

247
00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:53,760
А правда, что у них есть пиво?

248
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,840
Всё, что вы слышали - это правда.

249
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,320
Ребята, не могли бы вы чуток потише?

250
00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:03,720
Мы хотим сыграть в Богл.

251
00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:07,960
Ты!

252
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,240
И ты!

253
00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:11,280
Вы же должны были быть на моём
празднике.

254
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:14,800
И Гантер!

255
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,720
Что ты здесь делаешь?

256
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:26,160
Добро пожаловать в фо...

257
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:31,400
Хорошо, я извиняюсь.
Но я была нужна этим людям.

258
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:33,800
Они тяжко трудились всю неделю.
А сейчас суббота.

259
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:37,080
Они заслужили немного радости.
Идите!

260
00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,080
Знаешь, на моём празднике весело.

261
00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:41,800
Он слегка потише,
менее назойливым весельем.

262
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:46,520
Но если бы люди попробовали,
то тогда...

263
00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:53,480
- Хочешь, чтобы я пошла к психиатру?
- Дорогая моя, у тебя определённо проблема.

264
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:57,840
Ты подобрала себе парня
точно как твой отец.

265
00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:00,280
Ладно, мам, я запишусь.

266
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:03,600
Но сейчас... мне надо идти.
Кое-что сделать.

267
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:08,640
А ты знаешь, что твоя мама потратила
1200 $ на деревца бонсай?

268
00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,360
Я там был как Гулливер.

269
00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:14,240
Папа, я очень хочу послушать
об этом...

270
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:17,520
...но сейчас я должна отлучиться.

271
00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:20,600
Работаешь и работаешь
и работаешь по дому...

272
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,120
...но он только и думает
о своей дурацкой яхте.

273
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:26,040
Работаешь и работаешь
и работаешь с этой яхтой.

274
00:16:26,280 --> 00:16:29,040
Он всегда смеялся над моими
уроками гончарства.

275
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,120
И ты опустошён и в смятении.

276
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:34,800
Говоришь ему по сто раз,
но он всё равно пьёт из кружек.

277
00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:37,920
Один вечер её йоги и
Мостов Медисонского округа...

278
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:40,800
- Скотч и сигареты...
- Бонсаии и чихуахуа...

279
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:43,240
Я была на лечении всего
лишь три недели, но...

280
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:47,320
Что она хочет от половины
яхты чёрт возьми?

281
00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:53,640
Ладно, ладно, ты будешь шортами,
а я буду кожей.

282
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:57,120
Я буду кожей!

283
00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:05,720
Как самочувствие, тигра?

284
00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:10,200
Извини. Когда мои родители разводились,
меня многие называли "тигром".

285
00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:13,800
Ещё много "шимпанзе",
"шефов", "спортсменов".

286
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:16,680
Даже назвали "губернатором".

287
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:21,000
Вот как, так ведь?
Такой станет моя жизнь.

288
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,240
Моя мама тут, мой папа тут.

289
00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:25,880
Благодарение, Рождество.

290
00:17:26,120 --> 00:17:31,040
Она получит дом, он будет в квартире,
разукрашенной моей сестрой карандашами.

291
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:34,920
Чен, как ты прошёл через это?

292
00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:38,280
Я прошёл очень хорошо
составленную программу...

293
00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:40,680
...отвержения...

294
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:44,200
...и обписания кровати.

295
00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:47,680
Знаешь, я просто...
Это так странно.

296
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:52,360
В смысле, я была там и выслушивала
как они собачились друг на друга.

297
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:56,760
Всё о чём я думала -
это 4 июля.

298
00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:58,640
Потому, что это напомнило тебе как...

299
00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:02,080
...наши праотцы собачились
друг с другом?

300
00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:04,880
Просто каждый год
мы...

301
00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:08,000
...выходили на папиной яхте
и смотрели фейерверки.

302
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:12,120
Мама всегда ненавидела эти поездки
ибо океанский воздух трепал ей волосы.

303
00:18:12,360 --> 00:18:15,480
Моя сестра Джил блюёт
за борт...

304
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,240
...а папа всегда расстраивается,
что никто ему не помогает.

305
00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:23,040
А если мы помогаем, он орёт,
что мы всё делаем не так.

306
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:28,920
Но когда фейерверк начинается,
все просто замолкают.

307
00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:31,280
Знаешь, а я очень замерзаю.

308
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:35,040
И тогда мы все быстро
заползаем под одно покрывало.

309
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:39,720
Никогда никто не догадывается
взять ещё одно.

310
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:42,800
А сейчас это...

311
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,720
Да, знаю.

312
00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:10,680
Спасибо, что пришли.
Надеюсь, было весело.

313
00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:12,800
Ладно, Моника, мне пора сматываться.

314
00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:15,800
Я оставлю свои 10 глаголов
на столе.

315
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:18,240
Надеюсь, ты пришлёшь мне
законченную поэму.

316
00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:20,280
Хорошо, пришлю.
Рада, что вы пришли.

317
00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:25,000
- Я, кажется, видела Рейчел в коридоре.
- Дайте проверю.

318
00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:27,960
Твоя мама хочет попрощаться.

319
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:31,560
С Днём рождения, сладенькая.

320
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,680
Вы уж за рулём будьте осторожнее.

321
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:38,280
Что ты делаешь?

322
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:41,760
Я готовлюсь к водным лыжам.

323
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:45,640
Ладно, обнимемся. Ещё разок.
Иди сюда!

324
00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:49,640
Как вы?

325
00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:52,360
- Куда собрались?
- Забрать пальто.

326
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:53,960
Мы вам его принесём.

327
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:58,520
Хорошо, хорошо.
Я и сам могу забрать своё пальто.

328
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:08,480
Извините, мы под впечатлением от
пирога.

329
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:12,200
О, нет. Нет, вам нельзя
здесь находиться.

330
00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:16,080
Это место подготовки.
Это неправильно. Вам надо уходить.

331
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:20,080
Давайте, выходите.

332
00:20:27,120 --> 00:20:30,800
Или может вы желаете
крем-де-мент?

333
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:32,840
Мне необходимо двигаться
к моему шато (замку фр.).

334
00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:35,760
Кажется, мы снова идём в коридор.

335
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,360
Спасибо, что пришли, мсс. Грин.

336
00:20:50,120 --> 00:20:53,080
Берегите себя.

337
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,000
Ах, вы... детки.

338
00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:01,640
Чтож.

339
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:05,480
Это лучший праздник, где я
была за последние годы.

340
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,320
Спасибо!

341
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,200
Хорошо, ребята,
настало время пирога!

342
00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:19,360
Да! Готовьтесь
желатиновому веселью!

343
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:22,840
Похоже на то, что выходит из
тебя, когда подхватишь инфекцию.

344
00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:24,760
Ладно, хватит.

345
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:28,640
Итак, Рейчел, загадай
особое пироговое желание.

346
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:31,880
Всё, готово.

347
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:37,120
Руки вверх!

348
00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:42,000
Ух ты!
Это никогда не сбудется.

 
 
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